Miss My Wife from Abroad as we are seperated
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Old 05-23-2012, 11:46 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Miss My Wife from Abroad as we are seperated

Any advice for me would be good...Im 45 and my wife is 52....We have seperated and she is in america and I am in New Zealand as my kids live here...She has 2 kids as well tho one is 22 and the other 17 and about to go to college...mine are younger in their young teens....Been married 6 years and going out for 8....Been a hard road for me as my kids have lived in different country and i was with my wife and her kids tho her kids dont really like me and she took their side...Things have happened between married couples and we are no different tho thought she should stand by me more instead of her kids...Anyway not sure what else to say and dont want to drag this out tho hope we do get back one day and wondering how she will be when her son leaves home soon for college...Will she miss me then??Lets face it our marriage should have nothing to do with anybody else should it....Im pretty sure she still loves me tho ive been away for 6 mths and maybe our feelings are changing....
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Old 05-24-2012, 01:16 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Miss My Wife from Abroad as we are seperated

I'm currently living apart from my husband, as I'm an American (of Indian ethnicity) and he lives in India. He'll hopefully be here in January after his visa gets processed. It's been really tough on our marriage to be apart for so long (as we've already been apart for 6 months now since our wedding). We often have arguments, and a lot of the arguments seem to stem from the distance. When we are upset, we don't have the means of hugging or comforting each other to make one another feel better.

When you are in a long-distance marriage, communication is absolutely vital to the relationship. Make sure you are able to talk about your feelings and frustrations with the other person, else the emotional connection can get easily weakened. It also sounds like you have some sort of negative feelings to your wife for choosing to live with your children. I agree that spouses should live together. I hope you both can work through this, as physical distance in marriage should be kept to the minimal, with an end time in mind. It would be important for you both to discuss how long this separation would be, and when you both are getting back together.
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Old 05-24-2012, 01:36 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Miss My Wife from Abroad as we are seperated

Yes thanks for your reply and know this is hard for you too...Actually my wife is in america with her kids and mine are in nz and we dont have kids together so not sure I made that clear enough and yes i have been communicating with her tho she doesnt really much with me as she seems to only care abouit her kids and her parents...And even tho I havent been on best behaviour all the time during our marriage i can also say that she hasnt either and i get all the blame for this and living with her kids hasnt been easy either especially when she babies them like they are 2 or 3....
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Old 05-24-2012, 01:46 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Miss My Wife from Abroad as we are seperated

You said that things happened and she took her children's side. What happened? Did it contribute to the separation, or was the separation something you both had planned? Is there a time frame you guys have about reconciliation, or is it all up in the air for you both? If you miss your wife, it means that you value her. If you value her, then it's better to try and work through your troubles, rather than just hope for a reconciliation when some time has passed. Have you had a chance to think about why things are the way they are in your marriage at this point? Being separated across that kind of distance must be tough, but, it also gives you both a lot of time and space to think about how to proceed. Good luck to you.
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Old 05-24-2012, 02:09 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Miss My Wife from Abroad as we are seperated

I don't know why people start new accounts to talk about the same problem.
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Old 05-24-2012, 02:16 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Miss My Wife from Abroad as we are seperated

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coaster View Post
Any advice for me would be good...Im 45 and my wife is 52....We have seperated and she is in america and I am in New Zealand as my kids live here...She has 2 kids as well tho one is 22 and the other 17 and about to go to college...mine are younger in their young teens....Been married 6 years and going out for 8....Been a hard road for me as my kids have lived in different country and i was with my wife and her kids tho her kids dont really like me and she took their side...Things have happened between married couples and we are no different tho thought she should stand by me more instead of her kids...Anyway not sure what else to say and dont want to drag this out tho hope we do get back one day and wondering how she will be when her son leaves home soon for college...Will she miss me then??Lets face it our marriage should have nothing to do with anybody else should it....Im pretty sure she still loves me tho ive been away for 6 mths and maybe our feelings are changing....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coaster View Post
Yes thanks for your reply and know this is hard for you too...Actually my wife is in america with her kids and mine are in nz and we dont have kids together so not sure I made that clear enough and yes i have been communicating with her tho she doesnt really much with me as she seems to only care abouit her kids and her parents...And even tho I havent been on best behaviour all the time during our marriage i can also say that she hasnt either and i get all the blame for this and living with her kids hasnt been easy either especially when she babies them like they are 2 or 3....

????
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Old 05-24-2012, 02:19 AM   #7 (permalink)
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New account??...As far as I know Ive never been on this site....
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Old 05-24-2012, 04:36 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Miss My Wife from Abroad as we are seperated

Coaster I just checked and your older account has been .

If you stop following me around the forum and attacking me you may be able to stay this time. I'm not sure how the mods will handle this type of situation. But If I were you I would try good behavior. Not doing the same thing that got you kicked off last time.

Last edited by Love Song; 05-25-2012 at 05:59 AM.
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