Lionelhutz

LOL!!! Damn Straight


I wouldn't leave if "ordered" to sleep on the couch. But sleeping separate is the start of a very bad precedent. It is a short step to leading separate lives and effectively ending the marriage.

When I gave up on our sex life I decided I would rather sleep alone but that was only once I decided my marriage was likely beyond repair.

southern wife

Sleeping apart is a bridge you want to "close"............so you're sleeping together permanently.

__________________
~~~ SW ~~~
~ A woman was sipping on a glass of wine, while sitting on the patio with her husband. She says, "I love you so much, I don't know how I could ever live without you". Her husband asks, "Is that you or the wine talking?"...She replies, "It's me ... talking to the wine.

A Bit Much

You can only change yourself. You can't make your husband do anything, he has to WANT to. If he's shown you over time he doesn't WANT to, then you have a decision to make for your own peace of mind.

Your happiness is YOUR responsibility.

Spadesrave

I think you are really negaitve. You post rude puns and try to blame this one me. you obviously arent reading anyhting that i am posting. and another thing the post i made was for tips on how i can calm dow nbefore bed time and work throught it not judge me and what you think on my part instead of the overall situation.

Spadesrave

Haha. YEA RIGHT! i will never wear lingerie. That was ruined by a night i tryed ot make romantic and turned out to be "one night" he wasnt up for it. nice. Never happen agian. but thanks for being fun and thoughtful!

Spadesrave

I dont want ot have sex alot. I have said this a couple of times. i jsut dont want to give my self to someone who isnt going to understand me. I am not going to make sex and issue. It is supposes to be intamite and if i am not feeling like things are good between us then its a no go. But also if i still feel bad he is still always wanting to go! sheesh.

A Bit Much

If what I'm saying is causing you to really think about your situation for what it is, then that's a good thing. Your marriage and the sum of your relationship is NOT all your husband's doing. You can be upset and angry at him and blame him for your misery, but the truth is, you continue to live in it. That's your choice to do so.

You shouldn't be getting that angry all the time. It's not good for either of you. Physically and emotionally over time, it's destructive to go on like this. The anger is a symptom, not the problem. Fix the problem and the symptoms will go away.

Spadesrave

Its not terrible. YOu ask for it you get it. I dont feel sorry for not wanting to be around him when he isnt going to compromise tell the truth and act like im part of his life. sorry!

Prodigal

Well, I do not mean this in a sarcastic manner, nor do I want to insult you. I hear you saying that talking to your husband gets you no response. Nothing gets resolved. You don't count. You don't matter.

If that is the case, why not consider moving your bed elsewhere? Like into your own apartment. (And that is not meant as a joke.)

Heck, if you are this miserable, then just forget the separate-sleeping arrangement and go for a separate-living arrangement.

__________________
I refuse to make anyone a priority in my life who considers me nothing more than an option.

You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.

lamaga

Anyone else starting to feel really badly for Mr. Spade?

A Bit Much

MEEEEEEE!

I don't do pity parties. This is sounding like it's turning into one.

Spadesrave

YES I KNOW ITS NOT ALL HIS DOING. I am not thinking about a situation i have already been thinking about for days due to something you posted on here. I dont blame him for my misery, i am not miserable just pissed off. but i do blame him for not trying to be part of my life and being here with his family and not acting like i should be first in his life instead of last. The anger is ridiculous i dont want to feel angry. I just want for him to realize its not his way or the highway its supposed to be us both everything sticks to us both. gosh. im so annoyed.

Spadesrave

Listen you really need to read this stuff you are posting and what i am actually telling you. seems as if you are trying to pull something from somewhere else. i dont need pitty. read the first post i even put on here. and think about how ridiculous this post just sounded. thanks!

A Bit Much

You want what you want (which doesn't sound unreasonable).

He either doesn't care, or doesn't want to change or both. Now what?

Lionelhutz

So you had one rejection and now you are going to permanently sit back and be resentful?