General Relationship DiscussionAlthough anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.
this may be better suited in men's club house because i believe a lot of women will defend their hubbys when they may not know the whole thruth...
but... does anyone else think that technology and social networking has made marriage harder? for me, it blurrs the line of cheating and getting emotionally attached. with web cams and skype the possibilities just freak me out.
i'm sure ladies do this kind of thing too, but i'm not a lesbian so i'm not too worried about what they do. but i feel like a lot of men have a lot of temptation online. is it true? do most of them participate and are just really good at covering their tracks?
i consider my hubs a great guy, but even he has been tempted by these easy and hard to resist realms of the interwebs. are we supposed to accept these things as "normal" now? are there really men out there who arent tempted by the internet and connecting with people outside their marraige?
how can you be so sure chelle? are you there everytime your hubs watches? the site i'm most familiar with has a chat box pop up.. if a girl your hubs thought was hot was in the chat box popped up, how could you be absolutely positive he didnt/wouldnt say anything?
i think i should have stated in the original post that you shouldnt be allowed to speak for anyone other than yourself.
Yes and no. He doesn't go looking for things like that. Once again, I am with him all the time, we don't have porn in our house, etc. But we BOTH played an online game...World of Warcraft. And we BOTH got involved with people from that game. We had them on Facebook, ingame chat, text. So, yes, it makes it "easier" to cheat. But, we don't have webcams, and we only used ventrilo for chat with people from WoW. Did that answer your question?
Once upon a time before the internet people got engrossed in their reading:
Playboy
Hustle
Beaver Central ROFL
Their attention was taken away from their spouses to a different world. The end result is the same, on the receiving end, only the 'blame' can be assigned to specific individuals, who are often, unpaid. I think before the internet and knowledge from tracking cookies, etc. people had more opportunity to stick their head in the sand. Of course there were the 70's and free love, prior to cell phones...people calling payphones in bars and other places, looking for their spouse...rofl. Whoever said knowledge is power didn't know what they were talking about. Knowledge is just knowledge.
I'm in luck as my husband isn't really into the Internet. If he surfs he's looking at cars not women. He hates fb and doesn't get the appeal of boards. Lol
There's a game? Not that I'd look it up or anything but the possibilities for personas seem really well, really....
oh yeah... there's a game... friend of mine showed me it a few years before i met hubby. It's very.... well... not something married people should be on imo... unless with eachother... lol.
I'm not interested at all. First, I don't want to cheat. Second, I'm not going anywhere near opening those sorts of doors. Life and marriage is complicated enough without increasing the number of outside forces working against it.
I don't really even use facebook. My wife does but she keeps everything, and everyone at arms length if you know what I mean.
I do believe it's easy for people to dismiss this new medium and for it to be seen as a norm. However I don't believe it is healthy, when so much is at your finger tips, it can be secretive (not good for marriages at all). Even if it's not a secret I don't think it's healthy to not use your own mind, imagination and for you not to be focused on your spouse.
I'm a guy and am online a lot. Out of respect for my wife and marriage, as well as not having any interest in it, I don't look for random women to chat with online. I'm recovering from an EA and know how easy it can be to connect with someone online and how destructive that can be for a marriage if you aren't careful.
i'm sure ladies do this kind of thing too, but i'm not a lesbian so i'm not too worried about what they do.
Um, I'm not sure how long you've been on TAM, but just about every other post in the infidelity forum is about women who have cheated on their husbands via the web (Facebook, chats, email, etc...), so straight women are also very vulnerable to the temptations of the web.
Its all in the mind. A person who wishes to get "lured" will find ways, facebook or no facebook. Similarly a person who does not wish to get "lured" will stay away from various attractions. It is much easier to avoid temptations of internet, chatting, skype, facebook if one does not venture in that direction with that intention. (e.g. chatting with random men/women, searching for pretty faces etc)
No matter how many red lights, they are all harmless if the switch is turned off
People are people, always have been. Technology may make it easier, but it still comes down to the person and what they want. I'm sure there were guys in the 15th century who had some etchings hidden away in the haybarn.