internet red light district...
 Talk About Marriage
  The Marriage Advice and Relationship Help Forums
  right
Forums - Online Counseling - For Therapists - Link to Us - Advertise  

    A Public Forum Provided by The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory
Register FAQ Community Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read


General Relationship Discussion Although anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.

Like Tree20Likes

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 05-29-2012, 06:17 PM   #1 (permalink)
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 6
Default internet red light district...

this may be better suited in men's club house because i believe a lot of women will defend their hubbys when they may not know the whole thruth...

but... does anyone else think that technology and social networking has made marriage harder? for me, it blurrs the line of cheating and getting emotionally attached. with web cams and skype the possibilities just freak me out.


i'm sure ladies do this kind of thing too, but i'm not a lesbian so i'm not too worried about what they do. but i feel like a lot of men have a lot of temptation online. is it true? do most of them participate and are just really good at covering their tracks?

i consider my hubs a great guy, but even he has been tempted by these easy and hard to resist realms of the interwebs. are we supposed to accept these things as "normal" now? are there really men out there who arent tempted by the internet and connecting with people outside their marraige?
hidingaway is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 06:21 PM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Middle USA
Posts: 900
Default Re: internet red light district...

hogwash. (Well, at least to the thinking that most men will be tempted.)


Hubby has facebook account, email, etc & would not ever cheat that way.

Now, he DOES look at some porn sites. But its just "watching" & all visual. No chatting or interaction type of sites.
Chelle D is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 06:33 PM   #3 (permalink)
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 6
Default Re: internet red light district...

like i said.. wives will defend thier hubs...

how can you be so sure chelle? are you there everytime your hubs watches? the site i'm most familiar with has a chat box pop up.. if a girl your hubs thought was hot was in the chat box popped up, how could you be absolutely positive he didnt/wouldnt say anything?

i think i should have stated in the original post that you shouldnt be allowed to speak for anyone other than yourself.
hidingaway is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 06:42 PM   #4 (permalink)
Member
 
Maricha75's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Michigan
Posts: 5,047
Default Re: internet red light district...

Yes and no. He doesn't go looking for things like that. Once again, I am with him all the time, we don't have porn in our house, etc. But we BOTH played an online game...World of Warcraft. And we BOTH got involved with people from that game. We had them on Facebook, ingame chat, text. So, yes, it makes it "easier" to cheat. But, we don't have webcams, and we only used ventrilo for chat with people from WoW. Did that answer your question?
Maricha75 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 07:21 PM   #5 (permalink)
Member
 
Gaia's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: In a swamp!
Posts: 9,747
Default Re: internet red light district...

I thought this was about the actual red light district game... lol.
Gaia is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 07:33 PM   #6 (permalink)
Member
 
Homemaker_Numero_Uno's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Henniker, the only one on Earth
Posts: 3,162
Default Re: internet red light district...

Once upon a time before the internet people got engrossed in their reading:

Playboy
Hustle
Beaver Central ROFL

Their attention was taken away from their spouses to a different world. The end result is the same, on the receiving end, only the 'blame' can be assigned to specific individuals, who are often, unpaid. I think before the internet and knowledge from tracking cookies, etc. people had more opportunity to stick their head in the sand. Of course there were the 70's and free love, prior to cell phones...people calling payphones in bars and other places, looking for their spouse...rofl. Whoever said knowledge is power didn't know what they were talking about. Knowledge is just knowledge.
Homemaker_Numero_Uno is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 07:49 PM   #7 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: South
Posts: 4,879
Default

I'm in luck as my husband isn't really into the Internet. If he surfs he's looking at cars not women. He hates fb and doesn't get the appeal of boards. Lol
Mavash. is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 07:52 PM   #8 (permalink)
Member
 
Homemaker_Numero_Uno's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Henniker, the only one on Earth
Posts: 3,162
Default Re: internet red light district...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gaia View Post
I thought this was about the actual red light district game... lol.
There's a game? Not that I'd look it up or anything but the possibilities for personas seem really well, really....
Homemaker_Numero_Uno is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 08:10 PM   #9 (permalink)
Member
 
Gaia's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: In a swamp!
Posts: 9,747
Default Re: internet red light district...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Homemaker_Numero_Uno View Post
There's a game? Not that I'd look it up or anything but the possibilities for personas seem really well, really....
oh yeah... there's a game... friend of mine showed me it a few years before i met hubby. It's very.... well... not something married people should be on imo... unless with eachother... lol.
Gaia is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 08:31 PM   #10 (permalink)
Member
 
Paulination's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: California
Posts: 391
Default Re: internet red light district...

I'm not interested at all. First, I don't want to cheat. Second, I'm not going anywhere near opening those sorts of doors. Life and marriage is complicated enough without increasing the number of outside forces working against it.

I don't really even use facebook. My wife does but she keeps everything, and everyone at arms length if you know what I mean.
Paulination is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 08:32 PM   #11 (permalink)
Member
 
*LittleDeer*'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: At home
Posts: 1,057
Default Re: internet red light district...

I do believe it's easy for people to dismiss this new medium and for it to be seen as a norm. However I don't believe it is healthy, when so much is at your finger tips, it can be secretive (not good for marriages at all). Even if it's not a secret I don't think it's healthy to not use your own mind, imagination and for you not to be focused on your spouse.
*LittleDeer* is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 08:38 PM   #12 (permalink)
Member
 
tacoma's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 5,029
Default Re: internet red light district...

I thought there were going to be directions.

tacoma is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-29-2012, 10:39 PM   #13 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 288
Default Re: internet red light district...

I'm a guy and am online a lot. Out of respect for my wife and marriage, as well as not having any interest in it, I don't look for random women to chat with online. I'm recovering from an EA and know how easy it can be to connect with someone online and how destructive that can be for a marriage if you aren't careful.

i'm sure ladies do this kind of thing too, but i'm not a lesbian so i'm not too worried about what they do.

Um, I'm not sure how long you've been on TAM, but just about every other post in the infidelity forum is about women who have cheated on their husbands via the web (Facebook, chats, email, etc...), so straight women are also very vulnerable to the temptations of the web.
tm84 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-30-2012, 02:53 AM   #14 (permalink)
Member
 
eowyn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 285
Default Re: internet red light district...

Its all in the mind. A person who wishes to get "lured" will find ways, facebook or no facebook. Similarly a person who does not wish to get "lured" will stay away from various attractions. It is much easier to avoid temptations of internet, chatting, skype, facebook if one does not venture in that direction with that intention. (e.g. chatting with random men/women, searching for pretty faces etc)

No matter how many red lights, they are all harmless if the switch is turned off
eowyn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-30-2012, 12:38 PM   #15 (permalink)
Member
 
lamaga's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Austin TX
Posts: 2,543
Default Re: internet red light district...

People are people, always have been. Technology may make it easier, but it still comes down to the person and what they want. I'm sure there were guys in the 15th century who had some etchings hidden away in the haybarn.
lamaga is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
I think the Light Came On Lonelynacrowd General Relationship Discussion 15 08-24-2012 11:54 AM
I have seen the light yellowsubmarine Experiences in Counseling 3 02-24-2012 05:05 PM
Please help me see the light... titan The Men's Clubhouse 15 07-10-2011 02:19 AM
The light comes on... Ppaxton Considering Divorce or Separation 2 06-01-2011 05:39 AM
how to see the light??? lost1234 Going Through Divorce or Separation 2 10-05-2009 07:50 AM

Member Area

Find a Therapist:


Sponsor Ads





Get The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory Help Guide via Email:
Name:
Email:




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:55 PM.



Copyright 2007 - 2013 © Talk About Marriage