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I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
I need some advice here. I have a pain in my heart that is unimaginable. Me and my wife have been married 10 years. We have two beautiful daughters. We both came from majorly dysfuncfional families. We are very moral. We have a good marriage. Ups and downs but who doesn't. Here's my dillema. My wife works two hours a day at our daughters school as a lunch mom. She has a new friend who she speaks highly of who works there also. I've met her and even been out with her and her husband. Last week I discovered something strange. In my top drawer we keep all our sex toys. We bought them when we were dating. OK we went to a sex toy party together. Anyways we haven't used them together in years. I see them every day because it is my drawer. For years they remained in the same position. Last Saturday I opened the drawer to get some clothing out. The drawer seemed out of order and my intuition alarmed. I lifted up the towel and three of the four toys were in different spots. I was perplexed. My suspicians aroused. I decided to get them out for sex that night. My wife remarked that she hadn't used these in ages. There's a problem with this. All three had new duracel batteries in them. I changed batteries in one of them like four years ago. All three had batteries from the same package of batteries. Duracell 2015. The fourth toy had a duracell from 2003. My wife said she can't remember the last time she used them yet there were new batteries in three. OK my wife may be shy about admitting to masturbating but when she did it was always the same one toy. Then it occurred to me that if three toys had new batteries then they were all being used. That could only mean with another women. My intuition went wild. Circumstantial evidence at best. The OW came over last week. I'm almost certain they had sex. I saw here at my daughters field day and she kind of mocked me at first and then apologized. I need proof. I made a promise to my wife that if I ever felt the need to cheat I would divorce her before committing such a treacherous act. I never cheated and had plenty of chances. I also told her if she ever cheated on me I would divorce her. I could never forgive her or trust her again. I need advice. I am sick over the fact that my wife may have had homosexual sex. To me that is worse than her cheating on me with a man. Should I confront her? I need proof before I divorce her. I can't eat. I can't sleep. I'm just sick over this. I would have thought my wife would ever have sex with a women. HELP! I don't know what to do. I love her.
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
Wait, so three toys were used so that automatically means your wife is cheating with another woman? Dude, there were times I would use three different toys when I was alone. Or maybe, just maybe, this woman was asking your wife's opinion on toys being used with her spouse and your wife showed her the toys, needed to put new batteries in them to turn them on....you know, the way they were demonstrated at the toy party. Your evidence, at this point, is circumstantial, at best.
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
I think you're really stretching things too. If nothing else, if you confront you're likely to get laughed at and lied to, assuming she is having an affair.
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
I believe this much:
you can tell the toys were moved. you open the drawer every day.
you can tell the batteries were changed. 2015 on duracell means the batteries were added recently. They weren't just added to one toy, but to 3. Also, the fact that the fourth toy's batteries are 9 years old--that is odd too
but, to jump from those things to an affair is a stretch unless you have some other additional evidence to link this up. And to jump from that to an affair with this woman, is an even further stretch, unless again you have some other evidence you haven't mentioned.
Still, there is something about that relationship with that woman that bothers you. The fact that this woman was disrespectful to you is obviously not good. Your wife spends a lot of time with her and talks about her a lot, and the first thing she does when she meets you is put you down. Not a good quality to have in a friend--did you mention the incident to your wife? What did she say?
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
Quote:
Originally Posted by iheartlife
I believe this much:
you can tell the toys were moved. you open the drawer every day.
you can tell the batteries were changed. 2015 on duracell means the batteries were added recently. They weren't just added to one toy, but to 3. Also, the fact that the fourth toy's batters are 9 years old--that is odd too
but, to jump from those things to an affair is a stretch unless you have some other additional evidence to link this up. And to jump from that to an affair with this woman, is an even further stretch, unless again you have some other evidence you haven't mentioned.
Still, there is something about that relationship with that woman that bothers you. The fact that this woman was disrespectful to you is obviously not good. Your wife spends a lot of time with her and talks about her a lot, and the first thing she does when she meets you is put you down. Not a good quality to have in a friend--did you mention the incident to your wife? What did she say?
Another thought I had was... maybe she DID get them out for some reason. Perhaps she had a hunch you would go into that drawer that day, and she moved the toys, put batteries in them, etc... anticipating that you might suggest using them that night. You say you have a good marriage, but could there possibly be a "rut"? And maybe she wasn't sure exactly how to address it, and this could have been her way of suggesting that you both need to work on something in the bedroom... I don't know. But I agree with iheartlife that the friend disrespecting you like that is unacceptable.
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
Quote:
Originally Posted by tacoma
I don`t know why he would he has evidence of nothing other than his wife is masturbating and her friend is rude.
with this and.... just have to say... OP... REALLY? I'm getting a bit of anxiety and ocd from OPs post... RELAX OP.... it's probably just masterbation OR she was demonstrating to said friend. Some people can be quite rude.. but don't assume they have any sort of "feelings" or anything for one another. You should probably just gather more evidence first if your really that concerned about it.
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
How do you know that she JUST changed the batteries? I know you open the drawer every day but she could have changed them months ago. She could be using them herself and not want to say anything.
Are you not only suggesting that your wife had sex with this woman but she had sex with her in your own house? Where were the kids?
I think you better tread lightly on this one because you may end up looking silly.
Have you ever considered that she was looking for something in the drawer? Or maybe experimenting with the toys since you all haven't used them in a while?
You say that the only reason for all 3 to have new batteries would be because she was using them with another woman but that doesn't make sense. Why would they need all 3 of them?
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
I'm not sure of anything. Again circumstantial evidence at best. That's why I'm asking for advice. Our kids get out of school next week. That will make it very hard for my wife and her friend to have potential sex. It's easy while they are in school. My wife has all the time in the world to cheat on me without ever getting caught. I work all day. Again my intuition just fired and an alarm went off. I hope I'm just paranoid and crazy. I'll still be married and everything will be fine. If I'm right then I have to think of my daughters. Me and my wife swore to each other that our kids were having "normal" lives. I hope she still believes that. It's one thing to cheat but another with the same sex. Her father would be as devastated as me.
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
Quote:
Originally Posted by ovalvox
I'm not sure of anything. Again circumstantial evidence at best. That's why I'm asking for advice. Our kids get out of school next week. That will make it very hard for my wife and her friend to have potential sex. It's easy while they are in school. My wife has all the time in the world to cheat on me without ever getting caught. I work all day. Again my intuition just fired and an alarm went off. I hope I'm just paranoid and crazy. I'll still be married and everything will be fine. If I'm right then I have to think of my daughters. Me and my wife swore to each other that our kids were having "normal" lives. I hope she still believes that. It's one thing to cheat but another with the same sex. Her father would be as devastated as me.
I think... you have been watching to many shows and movies with infidelity in them... No but seriously... i really think your jumping to conclusions here. Has your wife ever expressed a sexual interest in the same sex the entire time you have known her?
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
And for the person who said "showing her?" My wife could show her by using them on her or herself. Still classified as cheating. My wife should not see another woman naked and another women should not see her naked. You forget the fact that someone changed the batteries and that someone wasn't me. And that makes my wife a liar if she did change them for whatever reason. No proof but fishy!
Re: I think my wife is cheating on me with another women
If you have a gut feeling that something happened, put a VAR in the house or her car, or a hidden cam. Hell, leave a webcam in the room on and just check it every day.
I think there's more to the story, you wouldn't just jump from new batteries in dildo to cheating unless there were other red flags that you're not telling us. Unless you're naturally an insecure person.
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I think my wife is cheating on me with another women 
No but seriously... i really think your jumping to conclusions here. Has your wife ever expressed a sexual interest in the same sex the entire time you have known her?
