Here's the truth, women get bored and want something new, they are more deviant and coniving then men and they will say whatever it is that they need to say to hurt, cut down or hide the truth, so no matter what the true reason is, the ACTUAL reason is another man. thats it no ifs ands or buts!
Wow! Take a breath and count to ten! She's got you BSed. She's
turning it on you, and your swallowing.
If you want some views, stay around and read. Some posters are outlandish to shock you out of your fog. You will find a lot of experiences here, you won't get elsewhere.
She was also in the fog of an affair, and she just knew he was a horrible husband.
A match made in heaven!
My husband probably would (at one time) have said the same thing about me.
Funny thing, he decided to stay and reconcile with his "horrible" wife via marriage counseling. He's also in individual counseling to understand why he chose cheating--of all things--to solve his problems.
What a lot of judgment from a couple of sentences from the OP.
I dunno, obviously lamaga discounted the cheating angle, but the rest of the advice was pretty solid if the assumption was he wanted to stay anyway. *shrug*
This is just one person's opinion--so I completely acknowledge I may be wrong.
But it seems to me that if the chosen target for a relationship outside the marriage is a relative stranger over the Internet, that speaks of someone who is very hungry for validation--and possibly someone with low self-esteem. My guess there is nothing more than armchair psychology and not worth the paper it's written on. But it is based on the many threads I've read where people seek strangers to cheat with.
I have little doubt that her "wants" weren't being met. The question is, how reasonable were these wants. Did they amount to core needs that the average married person would consider reasonable? We really don't know. We have a couple of sentences to go on. But the poor guy got slammed because HE admitted in his own words that his wife felt there were problems in the marriage.
How can anyone really be shocked that he's left the building after that?
Again, I'm speaking from the perspective of someone who will own up to 80% of the problems in our marriage that made it vulnerable to my husband's 100% choice to cheat. I'm not "it's never your fault" ra-ra-sis-boom-ba for betrayed spouses.
I think that's what is getting my goat. If I had come for advice here, I probably would be gone too. Instead I'm here to say that you can come back from something like this and have a marriage that's better than ever. It won't happen for everyone, but it is possible.
Something has changed. She's had some great posts but in the last two days she's telling the guys its their fault that their women are in EA's or PA's. I understand her point to a degree but don't agree with her advice.