General Relationship DiscussionAlthough anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.
Just a general question. What are your views on flirting. Not sexting or taking it too far but smiling at a cute stranger or maybe flirting a bit with the bartender if you are at the bar with friends. Sometimes I think it can help a relationship as long as it doesn't go too far. We are only human. I also had this discussion with my wife and I think that sometimes a guy may flirt with a girl with no bad intentions just to see if he's still "got it". A woman doesn't need to really do that bc if she's still "got it" guys will most likely approach and flirt with her. Just thinking out loud, appreciate your thoughts! Posted via Mobile Device
Not sexting or taking it too far but smiling at a cute stranger or maybe flirting a bit with the bartender if you are at the bar with friends.
It depends on the couple. If I was married to a man whose jealousy was easily triggered, I wouldn't dare flirt - with a bartender or any other man.
That being said, my current husband was the antithesis of jealousy. I probably could have f^ucked the entire 82nd Infantry Brigade, and he wouldn't have noticed. No, I NEVER cheated on my husband, nor did I flirt.
However, I am not, by nature, a "flirty girl." Flirting with a bartender? Heck, they do it with their customers to assure a good tip. Harmless flirting is just that ... harmless. But it is a matter of degree. Is she just doing some innocent verbal jousting, or is she letting her taa-taa's hang out a little bit when she leans over to sip that Margarita from a straw?
I'm a flirty person occasionally. I know where to draw the line though and that is hugely important. No texting,no emailing,nothing beyond giving a smile and maybe a compliment on someone's outfit or whatever. I've never cheated on anyone emotionally or physically. I think mild flirtation is healthy with proper boundaries. You never flirt with the same person twice either!! It's a fine line between being nice,being flirty,and being a cheating wh*re
And for heavens sake,dont do it with people you know. Don't do it w your spouses friends or coworkers either! And don't do it when your spouse/SO is there.
Ideally,you should flirt with your partner as often as possible;-) that kind of flirting is open for all things...sexting,naughty emails,anything you want Posted via Mobile Device
I believe it shows insecurity on the part of the person doing the flirting, and is a huge turn off. I don't want a man who needs to flirt with others to prove to himself he4 still has 'it'. I want a man with confidence and who would much rather flirt with me and ensure a great sexual connetion within our marriage.
I think it's disrespectful. If you wouldn't want your wife doing it then I wouldn't do it if I was you.
Moreover it is creating temtptatation, when married people should be staying well clear of that. That's just the wise thing to do.
Sounds like you still need validation a bit like a teenage boy.
I don't think there's a right or wrong answer here. It depends on the people involved and their comfort levels. Personally, I am not a flirty person. I am generally shy and keep to myself. I have been with men who do flirt in front of me and with those who don't. I have to say that I am more comfortable with those that don't but I realize that it is just my own insecurities talking.
I'm against it. I don't see why I should flirt or why my husband should flirt when we are married. We should only have eyes for each other as far as I'm concerned. That's just the way I feel.
flirting is a beginning step of infedility!!!!
has to be. if you think about it, people flirt, they enjoy it, then they get to know one another and BA BOOM!!!! there it is.
no no no! thats a special part of you that you are giving to someone other than your lover.....tsk. tsk.
I don't know...
This is one of those " grey areas " in some relationships.
Some people tell me that I'm a natural flirt.
My wife is neither here nor there with it. When my wife and I are together,there is no " flirting." All my attention goes to her.
Sometimes women who I normally come into contact with everyday [ Laundry , Supermarket , Bank etc.] often tell me that when my wife is around,she " has me on a leash " , because I have no time to chat with them.
I naturally like meeting people. So if I'm in a line at the bank and a man is in front of me ,I naturally strike up a conversation,we share jokes or whatever and we laugh to pass the time. Now that's not flirting , because its a man.
If its a woman,then some may consider it flirting and thus taboo.
It's a shaded grey area. Some don't like it won't do it some don't care.
I guess it just depends on the person and the spouse and boundaries.
Mayhap a difference in flirting and coming on to someone???
Coming on to someone is not ok. What is the definition of flirting???
Smiling
Winking
Hugging (a certain kind of hug?)
Holding open a door
Saying thank you
Helping someone hull something heavy to their car
Talking nice to someone
Asking how their day is going
Asking about their family
Noticing they have new glasses, or hair color
Telling a guy his tie is nice/a chick her shoes are cute
Without starring dreamy-telling someone they have beautiful/unique eye color
Saying have a great day/nite/weekend
Is all this fine. Is it not ok with suggestive body language...no. Not to me.
But a normal conversation with another person of the opposite sex, what and how do you avoid being flirtatious??
You can't control how someone else perceives you in every day. I just say I'm a flirt because I assumed I was.
I don't know how I look to an outsider. I can only see with my eyes.
To me I'm confident, I dress nice, I have awesome shoes, I get/give a lot of complements. I always say please and thank you. I love my husband and have great sex with him.
I'm silly and genuine. I can only be me.
On the flip side I like game stop and comic book stores. It's nice to talk to people who are KNOWLY only interested in my brain.
The manga isle is 50/50.
I just think we are all different with different views.
If you are not ok with your spouse flirting than that's just your N.N.U.T.S. Nothing wrong with that.
We all have them. We have them too. We always talk about it and see where the other ones head is at.
No I don't flirt with other men. And I wouldn't tolerate it from my SO either.
I don't need any other attention than my man's. Besides, why would I want to flirt with other men and give them hope? Make them think they have a shot when they don't? I don't enjoy rejecting men, so I don't see why I would want to create the opportunity for them to make a move. That in itself is disrespectful to my SO.
I have a hard time telling when someone is flirting and when not. The same goes with myself. People tell me I'm naturally flirty so I can't tell when I'm flirting and when not.
But I know when you're in a relationship and something crosses the line, that's what I don't like. I think people in a relationship should generally be careful and not hurt their SO's feelings. To me, flirting with other people while in a relationship is wrong.
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
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Flirting 
