Newly Married
My husband and I dated for two years and have been married a little over 5 months. Our entire relationship we have always struggled with communication. When we were dating he seemed to try to learn how to get over the communication barrier he had. I am a very open with him, and hardly ever hold back exactly what my feelings are. Sometimes that doesn't really help our communication though. Any negative feelings i may have and share, hinders his ability to tell me what he really thinks. I find that he very often just tells me what he thinks I want to hear, which at first was just frustrating but now is making me angry, and insecure myself. For some reason since the week after we got married he just stopped trying to work on communicating. Anytime an issue arrose, instead of trying to listen to what I had to say, and communicating with me, he cuts me off and tells me that its all his fault and he is sorry (with no sincerity) and then moves on. I have found that lately when he ignores any problems that i bring up, instead of trying to help him to open up and tell me how he really feels about it, I just drop the subject. I have noticed that now I just no longer tell him what I think and how I feel. He also just lately is short tempered. Any sort of conflict between us ALWAYS ends up in him punch a hole through the wall or walking away and breaking something.My husband is a very very good person. He is very loving, attentive, and sweet. I love him very much. This NEVER happened before we were married. We are married rather young, I'm 22 and he is 23. A lot of these things I tell myself is just the immaturity reflecting in our relationship. I have asked him if we could go to some sort of counciling to help us learn how to communicate with each other. At first he was completely against it, and said that we didn't need that we could work it out between ourselves. Just recently I brought it up again, this time he agreed to it because he can see how strained our relationship is right now, adn how unhappy I am. But he said that the first time the therapist says anything that makes him angry or upset he is leaving. I'm just questioning how commited to this relationship he really is. He seems like he's given up and he expects me just to except the way things are. I can't believe or trust anything he says to me because he just tells me what he thinks I want to hear, to shut me up. He will promise up and down he loves me and wants to change the way our relationship is right now, and any suggestions I make he agrees to right away. But as soon as the conflict is over he right back to doing the same things he always does. I'm just not sure how to react anymore. I don't want to open up to him anymore because he lets me down so much. Am I setting my expectations of him to high? I feel like I have absolutely no emotional support from him.
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