Re: We have different communication styles
I tend to like communication via writing, too. but it started causing a lot of problems due to misunderstandings. sometimes i still do write to him, but i do it less often.
i still am not even sure what my H's communication style is. lol. he is a lot like you, he has a hard time formulating his thoughts when we talk. sometimes we sit for awhile and just say nothing and ive learned that he is thinking. i give him as much time to think as he needs. so maybe your H needs to be more patient with you.
Just give it some time. it takes a long time to learn about yourself and then try to incorporate someone else into the picture.
my H and i have tried so many things- and it was unbelievably frustrating for a long time. sometimes we write. if we get in a bad fight at night he'll write me when he gets to work in the morning. but i try not to use it as discussion. Just to share feelings in a non-confrontational way.
its just going to be hard for a little while, but hang in there. you'll have to come out of your comfort zone and talk and maybe your H needs to learn to be more patient with you and not jump down your throat (i only say that because that is what i did to my H, which caused him to be very nervous and clam up). You can also write and your H may need to compromise and write to you sometimes. but try to only use that as a place to share ones feelings, and not discussion. keep it brief.
"I'm a lover of what is, not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality."
- Bryon Katie