Originally Posted by jumper21
I've posted in the past, but I am that husband.
In my situation, there is a deep rooted issue that hinges on my wife that needs to change.
My issue started with her being over weight. After 6 years of our marriage and 2 kids, I finally told her that it is difficult for me to say it but I have an issue with her weight. Now, if I were told something like that, I would try to change it. If she would say, "what can I eat? How can I exercise? I am going to diet. And look good for you."
But instead, no effort has been put towards my wishes. To me, I feel like "I guess, I'm not worth it for her." or "She's so selfish."
I would have him just lay it all out on the table. If you want to know, be willing to change or be willing to find out. If it's not worth it for you to change, then at least you know.
MY RESPONSE TO THE ABOVE POST:
This is just infuriating. My husband just did the I love you but I am not in love with you. Well, he certainly was in love with me when I was his arm piece but after gaining 70 pounds with HIS child and becoming ill afterward I am still 200 pounds and our daughter just turned 9 years old, by the way, my father told me I could quit calling it "baby weight", hmmm wonder how I picked the same sort of abusive man? Anyway, I was playboy beautiful my whole life and I have had two husbands share the opinion that overwheight is sickening, unattractive, and non sexual. Well guess what? The first husband I was with I met when I was 19 yo and he thought going from 117 pounds to a healthy 130 was outrageous. My second husband told me during our first sexual encounter that "he liked a little butter on his potatoes but didn't like it slobbing over the side", I was 140 pounds, strong, shapely, and healthy. Now, I ask you men..........what if your wife was in a car accident and her face was permanently scarred? What then? No more sex, repulsivity? what is love? Love is an action not a feeling. Do you love your wife or do you want a woman who won't age? Do you want children? Well, grow up. I am almost positive that she knows she is overweight. I am sure she is traumatized and puts herself down enough without needing any extra help. If you are so visually inclined then do her a favor and leave. I hear there are still 18 year olds looking for immature men.
I've posted in the past, but I am that husband.
In my situation, there is a deep rooted issue that hinges on my wife that needs to change.
My issue started with her being over weight. After 6 years of our marriage and 2 kids, I finally told her that it is difficult for me to say it but I have an issue with her weight. Now, if I were told something like that, I would try to change it. If she would say, "what can I eat? How can I exercise? I am going to diet. And look good for you."
But instead, no effort has been put towards my wishes. To me, I feel like "I guess, I'm not worth it for her." or "She's so selfish."
I would have him just lay it all out on the table. If you want to know, be willing to change or be willing to find out. If it's not worth it for you to change, then at least you know.
MY RESPONSE TO THE ABOVE POST:
This is just infuriating. My husband just did the I love you but I am not in love with you. Well, he certainly was in love with me when I was his arm piece but after gaining 70 pounds with HIS child and becoming ill afterward I am still 200 pounds and our daughter just turned 9 years old, by the way, my father told me I could quit calling it "baby weight", hmmm wonder how I picked the same sort of abusive man? Anyway, I was playboy beautiful my whole life and I have had two husbands share the opinion that overwheight is sickening, unattractive, and non sexual. Well guess what? The first husband I was with I met when I was 19 yo and he thought going from 117 pounds to a healthy 130 was outrageous. My second husband told me during our first sexual encounter that "he liked a little butter on his potatoes but didn't like it slobbing over the side", I was 140 pounds, strong, shapely, and healthy. Now, I ask you men..........what if your wife was in a car accident and her face was permanently scarred? What then? No more sex, repulsivity? what is love? Love is an action not a feeling. Do you love your wife or do you want a woman who won't age? Do you want children? Well, grow up. I am almost positive that she knows she is overweight. I am sure she is traumatized and puts herself down enough without needing any extra help. If you are so visually inclined then do her a favor and leave. I hear there are still 18 year olds looking for immature men.