Need Advice? Give some to others as well... - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 32 (permalink) Old 02-23-2008, 11:21 AM Thread Starter
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Thumbs up Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

Here on Talk About Marriage, we get a lot of new people every day who are looking for help with very difficult problems they are facing.

Thankfully, we have a bunch of regular members who post responses to people relatively quickly. Lately, most posts usually get a few responses within a day or two. We really appreciate the advice and opinions that these generous people have to offer, they can brighten someone's day or shed some additional light on a confusing situation.

But you don't have to be a "relationship guru" or "marriage counselor" to give people your opinion here... This is a public forum, and it helps to get opinions from people with different perspectives.

One of the remarkable things about listening and responding to the problems of others, is that it momentarily takes us out of our own problems and frustrations in life.

So I just wanted to take a second to encourage everyone seeking advice here for the first time to please post a response to someone else's plea for help. I'm sure they will greatly appreciate it; and who knows, you might get something out of it as well!

Thanks for visiting Talk About Marriage!


Chris Hartwell, MSW

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Last edited by Chris H.; 02-23-2008 at 11:24 AM.
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post #2 of 32 (permalink) Old 02-23-2008, 05:01 PM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

You have a unique forum here, I think. There are several posters who blow me away with their intuitive answers and willingness to help other people. If some of us can shed a little light for other people who are experiencing problems that perhaps we have gone through ourselves, it feels very good. Thanks for presenting this website.
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post #3 of 32 (permalink) Old 02-23-2008, 10:37 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

Thanks MollyL!

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post #4 of 32 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 10:55 PM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

I sincerely appreciate this web site and all the caring comments. It minimizes the experience of isolation, loneliness and hopelessness that can be experienced in a troubling relationship. It is comforting to be able to communicate discreetly and to receive and give support. The benefit of writing and coming back over time to read additional supportive comments a few days later is that it allows me to get clearer perspective of the problem and what roll I am playing. It allows me to recognize my own avoidance and who I am being and what I am allowing by not being active in resolving the conflict. It is amazing how one can be lonelier in a marriage then when not in a relationship at all. This forum is extremely beneficial. I believe this site can help people discover and develop a healthier relationship by sharing their experiences and perspectives. This site is a wonderful gift to society. Thank you, thank you to all of you.
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post #5 of 32 (permalink) Old 03-19-2008, 11:20 AM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

I am glad I found this post. Sometimes I am hesitant to reply to a post because I am not expert on marriage or other issues. BUT, sometimes I find it helpful just to let somebody know you can relate to their problem, even without giving advice.
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post #6 of 32 (permalink) Old 03-26-2008, 11:12 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

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Originally Posted by bluebird View Post
I am glad I found this post. Sometimes I am hesitant to reply to a post because I am not expert on marriage or other issues. BUT, sometimes I find it helpful just to let somebody know you can relate to their problem, even without giving advice.
Sure, and "experts" aren't always right, either. IMHO, the more points of view, the better.

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post #7 of 32 (permalink) Old 05-16-2008, 11:08 AM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

I am a relationship professional - and it's been a pleasure to be able to contribute to this site via my articles in the way I do. My intention is to get more active on the forum as well as I think it's populated with a number of very kind, wise and helpful people - therapists/counselors or not - who are providing sound assistance and advice to a lot of people in need. I'm looking forward to becoming more of a consistant presence here.

Keep up the great work Chris!

Lisa


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post #8 of 32 (permalink) Old 08-04-2008, 06:28 AM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

Chris -
This is a fantastic forum, I'm learning a lot from reading all the posts, and it's great to see the diversity of people's experience.
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post #9 of 32 (permalink) Old 08-04-2008, 09:03 AM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

i accidentally stumbled across this site, when seaking guidance myself. i appreciate ppl allowing me into their problems , whilst it has helped me with my problems.
thanks .
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post #10 of 32 (permalink) Old 12-10-2008, 12:23 PM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

I try to post where I can but I also kinda feel like a hypocrite giving someone else advice when I can't keep my own life straight.

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post #11 of 32 (permalink) Old 12-10-2008, 12:30 PM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

Please don't let that hold you back from posting. Everyone has ups and downs in their lives, but the important thing is that if you feel you can shed some light, show empathy and support for someone in a bad spot they will probably appreciate hearing it. Sometimes just knowing you are not alone...you are not crazy...helps!
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post #12 of 32 (permalink) Old 12-10-2008, 12:36 PM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

Quote:
Originally Posted by lostluv View Post
I try to post where I can but I also kinda feel like a hypocrite giving someone else advice when I can't keep my own life straight.
You are not being a hypocrite in trying to share some of your sage with others in need. The mistakes we make in life, are many times, more important in the long run then the victories. If you can help someone benefit from your experiences be they good or bad, it is a wonderful thing to share.

And besides, you know the forum. If we think you’re full of crap, we’ll tell ya.


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Confidence – Love – Patience – Faith Are the tools to help heal a marriage.

"Some of the greatest lessons life has taught me came from my darkest days in it" -Amp
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post #13 of 32 (permalink) Old 12-10-2008, 01:06 PM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

Amp,
I have seen that here enough to know it true. That is one thing I enjoy about this forum...the open discussion.
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post #14 of 32 (permalink) Old 12-13-2008, 05:45 PM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

I will definitely do my best to give as much feedback as I can to other posters/members.
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post #15 of 32 (permalink) Old 12-25-2008, 12:17 PM
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Re: Need Advice? Give some to others as well...

I appreciate the help I received when I posted about our marriage problem. I knew some of the answers but was not strong enough to stand up for myself. The way some of the answers were written, I was able to stand up for myself and admit my part in the problem and move forward. I credit this site for helping save our marriage.
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