INTUITION

Is it ok for a man who is engaged to go out with female coworkers without his fiance? Am I wrong for not being comfortable with this. Is this action not some form of disrespect to his relationship. These are not women he has known for ever . these are women he may have just met in the past year. Should I be ok with this and if so can someone please tell me how , because i am just not for it.

Harvard

Depends on the expectations of the relationshipship when you started.

However, I can tell you what I have observed. There are many married women and engaded women of all ages in my office. Everyone of them has lunch either at their desk or meets up with the girls in the cafeteria. There are many men here who these women talk to on a regular day to day basis about work related issues or how's the family the kids etc but that's all. Hope this helps

recent_cloud

when i read the thread title 'man's best friend' i thought i was going to read and write about oh well.

did your fiance 'go out' with female co-workers before he was engaged and just dating you, or is this a new developmemnt since becoming engaged?

if he went out before i really don't see the engagement changing anything.

if he went out before did it bother your then as well but you just didn't think you had the 'relationship status' to say anything?

is he the only man in the group?

is the group representative of a specific department or team your husband works with who just happen to be female?

it's obvious you have a problem with it and good for you for addressing this issue now before marriage, no matter how it might be resolved.

INTUITION

Blanca

Some people would be OK with what your finance is doing, and some people wouldnt. no one is right or wrong. Its your personal preference. Its about what works in a relationship and not what if it is right for you to feel. If your fiance is completely comfortable with it then you are going to have a lot of problems because you two clash on how you feel about these things. he's going to end up feeling like you are controlling and that you dont love him. And you will feel like he doesnt love or respect you. Its not wrong that you feel this way, its not wrong that he may feel the opposite of you, but it may be wrong for the relationship. You might consider finding someone that feels the same as you do on this issue. Because to me, its a pretty big issue.

On the other hand, you could have some trust issues that will sabotage any relationship. have you been cheated on in the past? do you think you have trust issues?

__________________


"I'm a lover of what is, not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality."
- Bryon Katie

angryandfrustrated

I would be uncomfortable too. You should have been invited to make it appropriate IMO.

scarletblue

Just a question.....why does he want to go out with these women?
The answer to that may answer everything.