04-26-2010, 02:29 PM
Join Date: Mar 2010
| | Re: Just need to vent...
It's difficult to know that God is there when we are suffering. I've had a recent attitude towards God, myself, due to the discovery of my husband's affair. I found myself wondering if God cared for me at all, but I though of my children and how my ability to make something easier for them is not necessarily a good thing. God making something easier for me is not necessarily a good thing and now I am realizing that even though we thought we had a great marriage and an affair could never happen to us, we are learning even more about one another and what people are telling me is turning out to be true, and that is that a marriage which survives this comes out stronger.
Life is hard. It just is, but although life is hard, it is not all about loss and it has taken me many years to be able to say that, having lived a difficult enough life that my friends tell me they don't know how I've done it. We endure because, what is the alternative?
My own experience has been that when I feel abandoned by God (a couple of times in my life, now) that I'm not really interested in trying to chase Him down to find out what the deal is. He's wherever He is, I'm where I am, I'll get back to Him. Maybe.
Feelings are neither right or wrong, they just are and if you are having trouble hearing God through the emotional chaos you are living in, don't you think God understands that better than anyone? God is not an unreasonable sadist who enjoys our suffering and he doesn't expect us to be heroic; remember even Jesus expressed anguish at not feeling the presence of His heavenly Father, so do yourself a favor and let up on yourself...you are going through enough.