Oct 6th, '10 he told me he dint want to be married anymore and wanted out...he took his ring off that night. I was heartbroken, shocked and lost..... I stopped putting mine on a week ago....today i started fiddling with my ring finger only to realize i didnt have it on...had a huge knot in my throat.... sux.
My wife gave me her ring back when she left me. I was sitting in my car, she was standing outside. As a sort of dramatic gesture I tossed her ring in the car ashtray... but I later fished it out and put it on my pinky finger. I wore it like that for a few weeks, with both hers and mine on my hand, but then she told me she was moving in with her ex boyfriend. A few days after that, I took both of them off and tossed them in my junk drawer. I was one of those people who fiddled with their ring all the time, too, so now I just keep sorta rubbing on my ring finger where it used to be. I still love her very much, but I felt like it was pathetic to keep wearing it when she was already moving in with another guy, only a few weeks after she left me. So off it went.
I've just taken mines off. I've worn it only for 8 months. The length of time we've been married before he sideswiped me with the news that he NEEDED to get a divorce. I wasn't ready, but I am also going on 8 months pregnant and starting to show signs of swelling, so maybe my son is telling me something? I don't usually swell up so soon. (btw for anyone wondering and who can't quite figure it out - I got pregnant AFTER the wedding, it wasn't the reason for getting married)
I still hold them, look at it, and cry. My mother passed me her wedding set, and it was made even more special because my husband had bought a little diamond band to go with it. I ball everytime I see it and everytime I don't see it on my finger. I know he no longer wears his.
So interesting how something so small can hold so much for one person and so little for the next. It was so easy for him to remove his, and I felt like my heart was dying when I took mine off.
I have just reliesed that my W has either taken my wedding ring her when she moved, or thrown it in the rubbish, don't know, it isin't where I left it when she requested I move out.
This is dreadful. As if it doesn't hurt enough to have your marriage break apart. But possibly throwing the ring away in the trash/rubbish is just plain cruel. At the very least offer it back to your spouse or store it away. I think hocking it is also pretty cruel but I guess maybe that depends on who was left and who actually did the leaving. I dunno. Just seems to me that something that was an important and meaningful part of your life at one point should be at least respected.
It would have really hurt if I knew my W had thrown hers away.
thought I'd bring back this old thread from the dead...
I took mine off for a while when my wife asked for the divorce, then started wearing it again when she was thinking of R, now that she is sure she wants to go on with D and we are about so separate not sure if I want to keep wearing it, thought that it signals that I'm not available, then again I feel stupid for still wearing it. Not sure what I'm going to do with it when we have our divorce finalized, should I pawn the ring, cast it into the ocean, give it back to her or just flush it down the toilet?
Wore mine for 13 years and 2 months after I asked for divorce...my 8 year old looked at me one night and pointed to my hand and asked very matter of factly why I still had it on my hand. That was pretty much the only comment he has made about the divorce on his own. It came off that night and alternates between the door handle and ashtray in my car depending on where I'm digging change from. I'll probably keep it. I really like the ring as a symbol if nothing else. Reminds me of 13 years and 3 wonderful kids. I don't look at it and get bad feelings or remember the bad parts of my marriage. Even thought of putting it on a string around my neck Lord of the Rings style but the first two women that heard me say that said "Not if you ever want to date again". LOL
When stbxw left the first time she took everything but her rings. That night I gave them back to her. Then when she moved back in I put mine in her jewelry box. After I kicked her out I left it in there even I gave her things back to her. As far as I know its still in there. Posted via Mobile Device
I'm still wearing mine. It's been 2 weeks since he moved out. His job didn't allow him to wear his at work. He would wear it on the weekend. When he moved out he took it with him...maybe he pawned it. I normally don't wear it at home while I cook and clean but wear it when I leave the house. I purposely didn't where it to church Sunday and I realized I kept fiddling with my ring finger because it wasn't there. I had to make myself stop because I would tear up. If nothing worse happens I guess I will wear it until divorce day. It also keeps people from asking me where it is.