My journal-Making it about me now - Page 9 - Talk About Marriage
Going Through Divorce or Separation A new addition to our forums, a place to go for sharing and support for those going through divorce and separation.

User Tag List

 138Likes
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
post #121 of 207 (permalink) Old 08-30-2015, 08:36 PM
Member
 
Marc878's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Southeast
Posts: 2,946
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Tough thing to go through.

I admire you.

I wish you the best in the future.

Marc878 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #122 of 207 (permalink) Old 08-31-2015, 12:23 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Deep South
Posts: 340
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Quote:
Originally Posted by TooNice View Post
I completed my 1/2 marathon yesterday! Wow... what a feeling of accomplishment. My pace is still very slow, but my goal was to finish in three hours, and I came in 6.5 minutes shy of that!


I did a great deal of thinking after the race yesterday. I started running some while I was still married (and before I knew the marriage was over). I decided to run a half after I moved out, and enjoyed having the goal to work toward. I am not certain it is something I would have done while still with my ex, and it felt really, really good.

I also had a wonderful and long phone call with my son today. I miss him, but he loves his college, and is thrilled to be back with his friends. Makes it easier to have him away from me.

Work is still insane, but it's almost a relief to have my son back at school. I don't really have reason to communicate with my ex now, and I feel like I can settle back into my solo life. I have some relationship/dating issues that I am starting to identify now, so I suppose that is the next step in healing and moving on.

I also have another 1/2 marathon in one month, so as soon as I recover from yesterday, I need to keep up on my training for that.

All in all... not bad.

Congrats TooNice! I did my first 13.1 nine years ago. Oy vay. MrsAbsurdist had to take me home in a wheelbarrow. I hurt from the top of my head to my toes.

You are doing well. We are all very proud of you.
Absurdist is offline  
post #123 of 207 (permalink) Old 09-22-2015, 08:00 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Deep South
Posts: 340
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Gentle bump for Too Nice to see how she's doing.
Posted via Mobile Device
Absurdist is offline  
 
post #124 of 207 (permalink) Old 09-23-2015, 10:07 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
TooNice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,100
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Quote:
Originally Posted by Absurdist View Post
Gentle bump for Too Nice to see how she's doing.
Posted via Mobile Device
You are too kind, Absurdist.

I am doing well. Work is still insane, but will hopefully level out soon. Been running more this week. Feels amazing to have 4 miles be the norm for a run for me. My next 1/2 marathon is on Saturday. I am looking forward to spending the winter training with my new running friends and completely kicking tail come next summer.

Running has been amazing for me over the past 1.5 years, for more reasons than I can say. Work has put it on the back burner for a couple of months, but I am happy to be making it a priority again.

Thanks for checking in on me.
TooNice is online now  
post #125 of 207 (permalink) Old 11-10-2015, 03:22 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
TooNice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,100
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

I recently celebrated a birthday - my second since moving out on my own; my first as a divorced woman.

It's made me sit back and take a look at the last 12 months.

I have been surprised at some of the things people have been saying to me in recent months. People I have not seen in ages will see me, we will talk and catch up. I'll tell them about the divorce, they will say how sorry they are. Then they will say that despite the divorce, I MUST be doing well. They inevitably make some comment about how I look. I am not a woman who takes compliments well, but I am trying to learn. It makes me wonder how I must have looked while I was married, that it is such a change for me now. I have had people tell me that I am radiating, that I just look so happy.

I am blessed. Truly, truly blessed. I have people in my life; some long-term, some I have only recently met, who have made me take inventory and simply be grateful. People who push me to be better. A better person. A healthier person. A happier woman.

While I still miss my family unit, I am realizing more and more that my ex-husband's indiscretions may just be the best thing that ever happened to me.

Who knew?
TooNice is online now  
post #126 of 207 (permalink) Old 11-10-2015, 04:41 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Deep South
Posts: 340
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Quote:
Originally Posted by TooNice View Post
I recently celebrated a birthday - my second since moving out on my own; my first as a divorced woman.

It's made me sit back and take a look at the last 12 months.

I have been surprised at some of the things people have been saying to me in recent months. People I have not seen in ages will see me, we will talk and catch up. I'll tell them about the divorce, they will say how sorry they are. Then they will say that despite the divorce, I MUST be doing well. They inevitably make some comment about how I look. I am not a woman who takes compliments well, but I am trying to learn. It makes me wonder how I must have looked while I was married, that it is such a change for me now. I have had people tell me that I am radiating, that I just look so happy.

I am blessed. Truly, truly blessed. I have people in my life; some long-term, some I have only recently met, who have made me take inventory and simply be grateful. People who push me to be better. A better person. A healthier person. A happier woman.

While I still miss my family unit, I am realizing more and more that my ex-husband's indiscretions may just be the best thing that ever happened to me.

Who knew?

It's all those 13.1s you're doing. It makes for a new and better you.

Unfortunately if I tried a half today I'd be in ICU... or a priest would be giving me the last rites.
Absurdist is offline  
post #127 of 207 (permalink) Old 11-10-2015, 04:45 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
TooNice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,100
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Quote:
Originally Posted by Absurdist View Post
It's all those 13.1s you're doing. It makes for a new and better you.

Unfortunately if I tried a half today I'd be in ICU... or a priest would be giving me the last rites.
Lol - I do think running has had an impact on my physical appearance in ways I did not expect. I am definitely healthier than I have ever been at any point in my life - even in my teens. But I also credit the people around me. I really am blessed with remarkable relationships. I get to spend time with people who make my heart feel full. How can I devote much time to feeling sorry for myself when I get to say that?
TooNice is online now  
post #128 of 207 (permalink) Old 11-26-2015, 11:52 AM Thread Starter
Member
 
TooNice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,100
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

The arrival of the holiday season this year has me in a far better place so far than I was in last year. I was able to choose among four different invitations for Thanksgiving, and would have been happy to spend time at all of them. My best friend's son (who lives near me but far from his parents), is spending the day with me later today and I just learned that he also had a number of invites. He chose to hang out with me. Love that. I am looking forward to a day with dear friends who have been there through thick and thin, relaxing, laughing and simply enjoying one another.

My son is home and has already chosen to spend some really wonderful time with me. He's with his dad today, but we still have the rest of the weekend, and my heart is already full.

For Christmas, I am simply leaving town this year. No Lifetime movie channel scenes of me bawling on the kitchen floor. Instead, my son and I are visiting my BFFs in their warm weather state, and he will head back here to spend Christmas with his dad. I will stay there, again, surrounded by love and the comfort of old friends.

To all of my TAM friends, I wish you a day of peace and contentment. Whether you are in a place that has you gathering with loved ones, or it's a regular day for you. Despite our life's battles, we all have much to be thankful for, and I include all of you on my own gratitude list!
TooNice is online now  
post #129 of 207 (permalink) Old 12-02-2015, 03:32 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
TooNice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,100
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Oh boy.

Overall, I am happy with where I am right now. It would be easier, perhaps, if I were one of those people with a close family. Siblings to lean on, parents to help, etc. But that's not my situation and I've grown to be ok with it.

I am facing a bit of a medical issue, and I have to admit that I am scared. I wish I had someone to hold my hand and wrap me up and tell me everything will be ok. Someone to go to the doctor with me, help me research, and to simply be there.

No matter what happens, I know it will be ok. And I know it could be worse than it is. But it doesn't make it less scary-especially by myself.
TooNice is online now  
post #130 of 207 (permalink) Old 12-02-2015, 09:11 PM
Member
 
Pluto2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 4,608
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

TooNice, I do know how you feel. I had to face a medical issue after my D and it was the only time I thought, gee it would be nice to have a partner help me through this. Then I thought about the partner I chose, and slapped myself upside the head.

You WILL be ok. Honey, we can handle anything, I promise.

But still, (((hugs)))


In youth it was a way I had, to do my best to please, And change, with every passing lad to suit his theories.
But now I know the things I know, and do the things I do; And if you do not like me so, To hell, my love, with you! --Dorothy Parker
Pluto2 is online now  
post #131 of 207 (permalink) Old 12-02-2015, 09:38 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
TooNice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,100
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pluto2 View Post
TooNice, I do know how you feel. I had to face a medical issue after my D and it was the only time I thought, gee it would be nice to have a partner help me through this. Then I thought about the partner I chose, and slapped myself upside the head.

You WILL be ok. Honey, we can handle anything, I promise.

But still, (((hugs)))
Thank you. Every so often, it sucks to be alone. Most of the time I actually enjoy it, but times like this, not so much.

Thanks for helping me feel less alone.
TooNice is online now  
post #132 of 207 (permalink) Old 12-02-2015, 11:05 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Deep South
Posts: 340
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Quote:
Originally Posted by TooNice View Post
Thank you. Every so often, it sucks to be alone. Most of the time I actually enjoy it, but times like this, not so much.

Thanks for helping me feel less alone.
Prayers headed your way. Keep posting TN. Let us know how you are doing. You have a lot of unknown named friends cheering for you.
Posted via Mobile Device
Absurdist is offline  
post #133 of 207 (permalink) Old 12-03-2015, 08:34 AM Thread Starter
Member
 
TooNice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,100
TooNice is online now  
post #134 of 207 (permalink) Old 12-03-2015, 01:22 PM
Member
 
Pluto2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 4,608
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

How are you doing today, TooNice? Just wanted to check in.

Still sending (((hugs))) cause one is never enough.

In youth it was a way I had, to do my best to please, And change, with every passing lad to suit his theories.
But now I know the things I know, and do the things I do; And if you do not like me so, To hell, my love, with you! --Dorothy Parker
Pluto2 is online now  
post #135 of 207 (permalink) Old 12-03-2015, 02:37 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
TooNice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,100
Re: My journal-Making it about me now

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pluto2 View Post
How are you doing today, TooNice? Just wanted to check in.

Still sending (((hugs))) cause one is never enough.
I'm a little better today, thanks. Still have to figure some things out, but I'm feeling a little less overwhelmed today. I'll take one day at a time and control what I can. Just needed a day to feel sorry for myself and to count my many blessings. This will be fine.
TooNice is online now  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
NoWhere's Journal NoWhere Going Through Divorce or Separation 540 11-14-2013 01:59 PM
Very's journal thing. Very Going Through Divorce or Separation 7 06-29-2013 11:14 PM
Journal SIP Coping with Infidelity 2 07-29-2011 08:58 AM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome