marksaysay

I'm starting to wonder this myself. As a man with faith in God, I believe that he puts you things for a reason. I believe that what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger. I also believe that some people are only intended to be in your life, not FOR life, but just for a season in order for you to see and learn some valuable life lessons. Believe, I will get through this with time. Right now it just hurts so bad. Like you said, I don't know if she is supposed to be a part of my better life and future.

lobokies

yes mark...

i believe you will get through this and .. i am sure you will be there someday(being strong and create the new MARK)

marksaysay

I think it's really over. I'm for certain that my wife is or has been messing around with one person and this will be even easier for me to deal with if she would just be upfront. I saw a text she'd sent last night asking someone if she could stop by to see them on the way home. Should I confront her since my information was the result of snooping or not?

the guy

You need more
do not confront

frankie_boy

DOn't confront her. She might (WILL probably) flip out about this and get a restraining order. You don't need that.

marksaysay

I've been reading about the walk away wife syndrome and it's exactly what I'm dealing with. She started being unresponsive in spite of my efforts at change due to some books I'd been reading. That's what makes it do difficult for me, I'd already decided to make some changes. She's out right now with one of her single friends doIng who knows what. I wonder if she's even found the f*** buddy she told a friend she needed. I'm not a quitter but I'm beginning to wonder if this is a lost cause.
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frankie_boy

That is just about the most hurtful thing she can do. Mark you know I'm also going through this divorce catastrophy too and I'm as devastated as you, but if I ever found out my wife said something like that as much as it hurts I will just stop trying. You don't need that, buddy.

marksaysay

I was hoping that this was my wife being her typical self because she gets kicks out of saying things like this that are for laughs but she really doesn't mean. She's always been that way. But given what we're going through, I wonder if she's serious this time. At the beginning of this ordeal, I was optimistic but not very much these days. I'm really at the point where I accept that it's over. I'm gonna continue to make some changes in my life that will make me better but I cant sit around feeling sorry for myself. Life does go on.
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marksaysay

Today, I began the 180 method. I actually got an opportunity to see the affects fairly quickly. I made some plans to hang out with some coworkers tonight. Then my wife calls and says that since our daughter is sick and since she would be hanging out with me tomorrow because of no school, she rather she stay with me this evening. When I told her that we would have to work something out because today was not my day to have her, and because I had already made plans, she didn't seem to like it very much. I hope this works. I'm gonna stay the course. I also noticed from the computer's history that she'd looked up quotes about forgiveness to post on facebook. Now her lack of forgiveness is one of the reasons we find ourselves in this situation. I'm not saying that nothing I did didn't warrant some anger, but as a Christian, I believe what the bible says about love being blind. She may have been also mad because I think she found out that I'd saved an excel file of all her cell phone activity. She may have even gotten on here, as she did a few days ago to read what was being posted. Who knows, but I will stay the course. Do you all perceive these as good signs or not? If she did these things, which I really believe she did, why would she if she was "checked out" or "done" with this relationship?

kilobit

Mark.. friend I am in a similar situation as you, the walkaway wife syndrome its pretty drastic The BIG one.

I would like to give you hope but I am blinded like you. I am not the giving up type of person and am also trying the 180 but let me tell you, it takes balls and dedication and i am having issues with knowing how to act around my wife. I feel like if I went sky diving or did something extremely exciting it would change my attitude. I know that you must be a different person and it cannot be fake, you do it for yourself. Dont tolerate disrespect period.. and dont give up on yourself. that has to be fixed before anything else.