I'm new here. I've been separated from my husband for 2 weeks now and I've been reading people's experiences on this site and finding it really helpful just to know that I'm not the only 1 going through such a painful time....
I've been married for 5 years, no kids yet but I really wanted to start trying
My husband told me he wanted to separate 3 weeks ago saying he wanted 'space' to think and he was not sure if he loved me anymore of if the marriage could survive. He said he felt I was too controlling of him, he had lost who he is as a person and that I critisized him too much, he said he resented me for trying to make him into the person I wanted him to be instead of just accepting him. From my point of view, I didn't feel he looked after me, supported me or truely cared for my feelings to the point of being very selfish. About 18 months ago I discovered he had an affair....which he had outright denied and lied about until I confronted him with irrefutable proof.....even then I still think he never told me the whole truth and says it was 'only' an EA, while I think it was likely it was sexual too....I don't feel able to trust him and now with him wanting a separation I wonder if there is another woman involved - although he denies it point blank.
I just feel so rejected and hurt, the pain is so much. I really thought I put a lot of sacrifice, hopes and effort into making our marriage work and trying to get over and forgive his affair. I just feel as if it was so easy for him to throw me away and out of his life. Now I am so confused as to what I want. I love him but this just too painful and too much hurt to bare. I'm lost and lonely, all my hopes and dreams for the future have crumbled away and I'm scared I'll never had the family I dreamed of.
I would be so grateful for any advice on how to cope and get through this, I just feel that my life is crumbling around me.