01-29-2011, 06:00 AM
Join Date: Dec 2010
| | Re: frustrated
It's going to be like this for a while. You will go through these ups and downs. A friend who went through this a couple years ago told me that this is like building muscle. At first, if we're completely out of shape, this type of thing will debilitate us. Then, as time goes on, the muscles get stronger and more in shape. The hurt doesn't put us in pain for as long and it's not s intense. Then, the hurt sort of goes away. This is very fresh for you so you're just building your muscles right now and the extreme sadness/mood swings are normal.
As far as wanting him back, I completely get that. Part of me wants mine back too - the old H, not this guy that he turned into - but if the old one came waltzing back, it would be hard to reject him. The thing is though that no matter why he left or how much he knows you're hurting, you can't ever control another person. No matter how much we try to get them to see, if they don't want to, they won't. It's a very hard pill to swallow and it's going to get stuck on the way down. At this point, try to focus on you and the kids. If today is a really bad day, just try to recognize that tomorrow may not be as bad. Just take care of you. If he comes back, it will have to be all his choice. If not, you will get through, but unfortunately time will have to pass.