denise1218

I am struggling today. For those of you that know my situation..this is not something i wanted. I would do anything for my husband to say that he loves me and wants to fix us and our marriage. I know everyone says to give him space and time while doing that to take care of myself and do what I need to resume some sort of life. My whole life is crumbling. My husband left after 20 yrs together. Our house is about to be foreclosed within the next month. I have no money to move. But you know what sucks more than all that? When my husband decided to leave..I had one requirement...I told him to make sure he calls the boys every night to say gooodnight and I love you. Well.. the last time the boys have heard from him was last wed when we went to his place to do our taxes. No phone call..no Facebook chat..nothing. that pisses me off. My boys did not do any anything to deserve this. The thing that doesn't make since my husband is a wonderful person,a wonderful dad...this is so out of character of him. I just don't understand. Another sad thing is the boys haven't even asked why dad hasn't contacted them. This makes me so so sad. I can't stop crying. Please anybody have advice.
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helpinnyc

hello Denise,

I don't have much experience in this matter but all I can tell you is to stay strong. If not for yourself, than for your boys. Find solice in them and dedicate your life to being happy for your children.

Good luck and smile...tomorrow is always another day.

Why Not Be Happy?

Good luck----hang in there. Is he depressed? Would he consider counseling with you (or seperately)? I know you mentioned your parents in an earlier posting----can you stay with them in the short term (just to get stabilized).

denise1218

Yes..my husband has been diagnosed with depression. He just got put on antidepressants about 3 weeks ago. we went to one counseling session together. now we each go separately. he has not told me what goes on in his sessions.
I love him so much...but what he is.doing to the boys is what I can't deal with.
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Why Not Be Happy?

it isn't fair to the boys (or you because you have to deal with it)-----I know you shouldn't have to; but why not say something to him about it?

denise1218

I feel if I say anthing to him about it....he would go on the defense and then think I am just trying to hurt his feelings or something. Last week when we were at his apt....I left him a note....nothing bad....just basically telling him how much I love him but hate the situation. Yes, I would like for us to get back together, but as each day passes I realize that is not going to happen....but I told him that I want him to be happy within himself and with someone else. As of this moment...he hasnt acknowledged that letter.....positive or negative comments....which makes me realize....him saying nothing...says everything. He does not want me and unfortunatley the boys are in the middle.