My Weekend...

DjF · 02-28-2011, 06:32 PM

Friday my son came home from college, my daughter came over with the baby, so I fixed all of us a good meal of BBQ chicken with all the fixens...my wife was sick so I later ran a plate of food over to her apartment for her...we cuddled and talk, but it wasn't anything meaningful so I headed home before I got to frustrated...

Saturday was just full of "stuff" that kept me worn out...

Sunday our college boy ran in an indoor track meet, then we had a banquet to go to for the younger son...so, it was a busy weekend with a lot of family time...I was exhausted yesterday and is a pizzy mood so I just kept my distance and even though we spent most of the day together, I probably didn't say more than 10 words to my wife...I just didn't want to say something stupid, to vent, so I stayed quiet...

Last night she texted me on facebook asking what was wrong...and I told her that I was exhausted, frustrated, that I wanted my wife back...and I didn't win the powerball...

she replied I had a better chance of winning her back...we then chatted for about an hour...

I get up this morning and had an email from her thanking me for spending the weekend with her, that when she left last night, she didn't want to leave us..."first time I've felt that way" since she moved out was how she ended her email...she posted on facebook how she had a wonderful weekend with her family and husband...didn't want it to end...

get home today, the facebook post is gone...she won't talk about counseling (that is why I left her place early Friday night)...I'm just so confused, tired of her yo-yo games...tired of being in limbo...

back to no contact until more family stuff comes up!

vivea · 02-28-2011, 06:45 PM

Ugh Dan are you serious...why would she do that.It seems like she is still not certain ...GOD i hate these games...
I need good news in this forum...it seems like no matter what we do it's still not enough....

DjF · 02-28-2011, 06:51 PM

It's my own fault...I get my hopes up, let my guard down...and just get tossed a side again...it's my own fault I keep letting it happen...

I told her the other day that for my 50th birthday, I would like her to move back home...she said maybe we could start marriage counseling by then...

I'm getting tired of her living on her timeline and has no consideration about my son's or mine...

she wants to spend more time her, says she misses us, but won't make a committment to move forward with the relationship...I told her she was welcome here anytime, but am rethinking that...the boy can spend weekends at her place!

DjF · 02-28-2011, 06:57 PM

stopped on the way home and picked up one beer...a tall one...haven't openned it, almost poured it out...I hear it calling me...

think I'll pop it open and watch my favorite team play some college bball tonight...then go to bed and toss and turn!

vivea · 02-28-2011, 07:04 PM

Dan don't drink it...i know you feel like "why would i not drink it when she doesn't care if i do or don't,she still won't be back" but do it for yourself...
She is opening up.... very slowly but she does...just do no contact again ...remember : do you want to lose only a few months without her or the rest of your life without her ...

DjF · 02-28-2011, 07:11 PM

don't worry..it's a NA beer...kinda like kissing my aunt with the hairy upper lip...

Babyheart · 02-28-2011, 07:24 PM

Urgh why do they keep jerking us around? Am really nervous about where things will go with himself. Last night was good, am hoping he doesnt turn back around on me now.

Hope you enjoyed your hairy lip beer LOL

DjF · 02-28-2011, 07:41 PM

I will Babyheart, I will...

on top of that, I think I'm coming down with whatever mife wife had late last week...it's a conspiracy I tell ya!!!

vivea · 02-28-2011, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DjF

don't worry..it's a NA beer...kinda like kissing my aunt with the hairy upper lip...

haha good ,not my favorite too...had to drink it while pregnant too..yuck

Freak On a Leash · 02-28-2011, 11:16 PM

Glad you are going for the nonalcoholic stuff.

Make sure you stay on that wagon!

Your wife is conflicted..scared. She DOES want to be with you and your kids but she's also afraid of getting too close and being hurt. She might actually like the fact that she's on her own and without pain..but misses and loves you. She's "betwixt and between". I feel for her.

I can relate.If my husband suddenly started to change for the better and take real steps to reconcile I don't know if I'd react any differently. T

Part of me is glad that isn't the case. Makes things easier. I know, it's weird, but it's true.

Crankshaw · 03-01-2011, 12:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Freak On a Leash

I can relate.If my husband suddenly started to change for the better and take real steps to reconcile I don't know if I'd react any differently.

I asked once before, if you and for former partner are both doing a 180, who makes the move to get back together ?

Freak On a Leash · 03-01-2011, 06:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crankshaw

I asked once before, if you and for former partner are both doing a 180, who makes the move to get back together ?

Hmm..interesting question. Might be a stand off, eh?

My husband has been doing a "180" for a long time. Unfortunately in the wrong direction.

I don't know if you mean specifically for me or in general. My situation is a bit different. Lots of factors. To bstart, there will be no changes until my husband stops his affair with his bottle of rum and goes to rehab. He says I need to make changes as well before he considers reconciliation.... So we are pretty much at a standstill.

Plus, I rather like my life the way it is. The only times I miss him is on the weekends and that's fading as time goes on. I don't miss him as much as I miss what we once had. He can still do things to change the situation but I don't know how long that will last.

Basically, I am doing the 180 for myself, not to get him back.

woodstock · 03-01-2011, 06:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Freak On a Leash

Glad you are going for the nonalcoholic stuff.

Make sure you stay on that wagon!

Your wife is conflicted..scared. She DOES want to be with you and your kids but she's also afraid of getting too close and being hurt. She might actually like the fact that she's on her own and without pain..but misses and loves you. She's "betwixt and between". I feel for her.

I can relate.If my husband suddenly started to change for the better and take real steps to reconcile I don't know if I'd react any differently. T

Part of me is glad that isn't the case. Makes things easier. I know, it's weird, but it's true.

I understand what you are saying there. Odd feeling for sure