Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Central Virginia
Re: The LC/NC Thread..
Shianne, it's hard when you've spent years being responsible for someone else's mental health--hard to let go, to stop. I admire you for making the effort. Keep it up. Remember that as long as your kids are with you, there is no need to answer the phone--your mom and sibs (if in the picture) will understand, and you can call them back if they leave a voice message. Have you told him to stop calling and texting? If not, do it--he can have one email address for communicating about the kids or, better yet, set up a neutral intermediary (your lawyer, for example). Just do it. After you go through your initial panic about it, it will feel sooooooooo good!
And keep telling yourself, "I am not responsible for him." Over and over again, when you get the urge to check up on him.
Traumatic bonding--powerful term, powerful stuff. But you are stronger, and you will cut those chains that bind you!