Now her family is reaching out to me - asking to talk - something they haven't done before.
I need a little peace.
This is the time where you need to be careful and focus on the END GAME. If you are not sure about what you want…get CLEAR.
Then keep that in mind. Sounds like you aren’t anywhere near wanting reconciliation so your job right now is to follow your lawyers advice and keep her as mellow as possible.
Since she is seeing a different side of you now, she may want to R…or at least tell herself that since she is now glimpsing what she will be missing.
If her relatives call or text, just tell them “This is something you need to take up with her.”
DON’T give them the “it’s over” Speech.
They are probing for information that they will feed right back to her.
IF they ask if you are open to R, just say “I’m not sure. Once we get some things straightened out, I will give it some thought.”
This will prompt her to WANT to settle up.
Once she settles up and things are on paper, then you can go cold on her.
Remember to shoot for “fair”…you want to be able to sleep at night.
In my mind, this thing is done and over, but she may be thinking differently.
ALWAYS come here for perspective before you agree on anything she suggests.
Run stuff by your lawyer if you are even in the slightest doubt.
I feel for you, but now is the time to be cool.