Hi all, I been busy so I wasn't here for a while.
Wife cheated on me last year, it was a huge ordeal and FB was the source she found him, she was addicted to Farmville and other games. Fog is clearing up. On the 4th of July she tells me she filed for divorce. We had been going to MC and she wasn't doing the work so it wasn't a surprise, I had been hurt so bad, so often I was happy when she told me.
My happiness threw her off, she started to cry and over the next 2 days she gave me the apology I had been waiting for, a sorry that was from the heart and not just words. She even confessed she knew the damage she's done to the children and how sorry she was the whole time, she just couldn't stop herself. It was a beautiful moment and I felt the whole marriage was complete w/ an end, I could walk away w/ everything I had hoped for after the affair.
She tells me she loves me, she has sex w/ me and we're nice as pie to each other but the divorce is still a go. The reason for the divorce? She said I was mean to her, I called her names, this is true but the state she was in....I feel I was right, she had to be woken up from "HER WORLD". Tonight she tells me she needs "healing" and it will take a while, and that is the reason she needs the divorce, she needs space. She feels it'll take about 3mo and she'll want to get back together but she doesn't want me here while she does. Her addiction to games is bad, she just might be wanting to get back to playing but in any case I am ready for the future.
Mouse
smackdown: My stbxh had an EA (possibly PA but they live far apart) from FB and refused to tell me the truth. One day, he admitted it the next day denied telling me it was what I wanted to hear. But she was in his favorites on cell, sent her music and I overheard him calling her honeybun. Need I more proof? No.
But I wanted the truth for closure. He wanted his cake and to eat it to. He went down where she lives and I think was disappointed because she is 65 yrs old, married 45 yrs...but he had done all the classic cheating things: new clothes, dyed hair, motorcycle, texting, FB, secret calls, running away on vacations....
It's over, my divorce date is 7/19. Am I happy? Not particularly. Is it the right thing to do? Yes.
I am happy for me, the drama is over and I got the heart felt apology I was looking for. I believe she needs the healing she's talking about-side story her mother went crazy @ the age of 40, she slept around like a real *****, when her mother went back to her dad there was NO apology, no remorse, and no change. Her father (a good christian) took her back and forgot the whole thing EXCEPT he doesn't trust her @ all, he watches her like a hawk. My wife never got closure on the matter either, she was lied to by her father so "things would smooth over" he told me the truth last year when she cheated. So you can see she has so much pain to deal w/. I feel sorry for her but I also feel FREE. I cry for my children, they were just told we're getting a divorce, so sad, I wish I could change for them but I have come a long way to get out of her clutches, I can never go back. Her sins will haunt her the rest of her life and if she doesn't change it will haunt our girls. My boys are strong Christians and know the power of God can and will heal all wounds BUT you have to let him.
Mouse
I am on the same page....my lawyer has instructions to "re-file" the day she cancels the divorce. I just hope she does all the paper work first and save me the trouble.
Mouse
I'm out of the house and boy let me tell you:
Food has taste
The sun shines brighter
People are friendly again
I feel good about ME!!
She asked me over for sex and I never showed up, hell I didn't even call. Going back is like breaking my own heart, DUMB.
Mouse
This will implode around her. Karma is a *****. You are not her back up plan, nor should you wait around. Divorce has consequences.
Just wait, after you are divorced and she is between flings that phone is going to wring, my car wont start, the washing machine is broke........and I know what your answer will be becuase you get it.
So far she's waiting for me to miss her so much I come running back...not happening. We had words yesterday, the divorce is all my fault, her cheating was my fault, her depression was my fault...I was amazed how she just keeps putting everything on me and how nothing was her fault. When asked the question "do you miss me yet?" I answered "No, the fighting is nothing to miss." Ya ever see a wet cat? I couldn't run fast enough, the insults just came out of her mouth so fast I never want to go back!!
Mouse
She should meet my STBXH, very similar - addiction to twitter, video games, iPhone (now it's an EVO), EAs throughout our marriage, and the lies. Same thing with needing space and everything.
Stay strong - mine moved out, then would get online and try to pretend I was a stranger and flirt online then want to come back for sex. Made me so mad and hurt, but I was trying to keep a hold of him - now things have moved forward and divorce should be filed soon. I feel so much better about myself and everything.
She should meet my STBXH, very similar - addiction to twitter, video games, iPhone (now it's an EVO), EAs throughout our marriage, and the lies. Same thing with needing space and everything.
Stay strong - mine moved out, then would get online and try to pretend I was a stranger and flirt online then want to come back for sex. Made me so mad and hurt, but I was trying to keep a hold of him - now things have moved forward and divorce should be filed soon. I feel so much better about myself and everything.
Amen about feeling better about myself!! I feel like crap when I even talk to her much less have to have sex w/ her!!
Mouse
Just got nice :) 
