Bit of a breakthrough
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Old 07-16-2011, 11:50 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Bit of a breakthrough

Went to wedding yesterday, good food, great friends, great day all round. Went to a party afterwards, got a bit drunk. Anyway to cut a long story short and without too much detail I slept with one of my close (male) friends. It was actually more about having someone in bed holding me than anything else (and that was pretty much what went on). But the best thing I don't feel bad about it....I don't feel like I've betrayed my ex, I don't feel guilty, I don't want anything from it, it was a one off thing, I'm not agonising over it, it was what it was and now its done.

Maybe I am making progress........at last!
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Old 07-16-2011, 06:37 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Bit of a breakthrough

Yip! Good for you. It does seem like you are making great progress. You shouldn't feel bad about it, you should be glad you were able to have someone else in bed and are fine with it. Definitely shows you are recovering. :-)
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Old 07-16-2011, 09:50 PM   #3 (permalink)
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ever: well done and I hope it was.

Good for you. What a huge step. I am nowhere there yet but it sa comin ( no pun ). I can feel it (eventually). I have to work on forgiveness once I am good with that then I will be good to go for all the fun things again.

Have a great BIG time!
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Old 07-16-2011, 11:48 PM   #4 (permalink)
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ever: well done and I hope it was.

Good for you. What a huge step. I am nowhere there yet but it sa comin ( no pun ). I can feel it (eventually). I have to work on forgiveness once I am good with that then I will be good to go for all the fun things again.

Have a great BIG time!
LOL!
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Old 07-17-2011, 12:52 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sparkles422 View Post
ever: well done and I hope it was.

Good for you. What a huge step. I am nowhere there yet but it sa comin ( no pun ). I can feel it (eventually). I have to work on forgiveness once I am good with that then I will be good to go for all the fun things again.

Have a great BIG time!
ah.. lol.

way to go, ever.
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Old 07-17-2011, 02:40 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Bit of a breakthrough

Thanks everyone...

Must admit have been a few blushes today....but they are the usual how drunk was I ones and how many people know about it ones.

Sparkles - there is no way I would have said I was ready, waking up not alone came as a bit of a shock I can tell you. I thought I was going to be alone pining for my ex forever, now I can see that in the future there will be someone else, and I'm fine with that whenever it happens.
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Old 07-17-2011, 03:01 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Bit of a breakthrough

That must have been a nice feeling, knowing that you still got it, can still get it and are enjoying life. I'll get there too, not happening this weekend, too lonely couldn't even drag myself out of the house today, and I was even invited out to the lake for boating Why do the hard days suck so bad. Ok enough about that, lets here some more good day stories!!
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Old 07-17-2011, 01:34 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Good for you girl,enjoy it.It is a progress.
So happy to hear when someone makes a progress...small steps but steps forward .
__________________
H. and I married since 2001.Two kids 5 and 1
H. separated from me onDec. 1st 2010Reconciled March 2nd 2011 .
April 24th ,he told me he's been having an affair
May 11 the day he asked for divorce
June28th divorce papers were served to me
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Old 07-29-2011, 05:39 AM   #9 (permalink)
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It really is one step forward 20 steps back.....after regaining some of my confidence and getting a bit of my old self back I found out last night that my ex true to his ability not to follow through on anything, hasn't moved away like he said and was apparently one of the major issues in the breakdown in our marriage (oh apart from him sex with someone else - he wanted to move/emigrate and I couldn't at that point due to work, elderly parents) but has in fact moved back to the city I/we live/d in. So now I'm back to not wanted to go places in case he is there and wondering why he is back here rather than miles away with her, is she still on the scene and if he is in the city back to hoping he will get in touch!

Why just for once couldn't he just commit to something...
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Old 07-29-2011, 07:48 AM   #10 (permalink)
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You're human, and it was a friend, I wouldn't lose much sleep over that. If he creeps out on you he will get it and not be too offended when you point out that you were drunk. Probably he would say something like, well, let me know when you're drunk again. So long as you can manage the friendship be cool about it.
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Old 07-29-2011, 12:07 PM   #11 (permalink)
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The friend thing is not an issue, we are fine as friends and both happy with that...and we managed to get under the social radar so all is good. It's my ex that can't follow through on anything.....
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Old 08-01-2011, 03:48 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Well feel like I'm right back where i started.....since I found out he hasn't moved away I've cried more than i have done in months, he's on my mind all the time again....what if I see him, what if I don't see him, is that his car, is he still with her, is he not, is she living here too....I've even started dreaming about him again but the bit that annoys me the most is that I'm worrying about him. He's hanging around with the friends he was with when I met him and they are just not good for him....and I'm guilty that he might be going back to his old ways...I can't believe I'm feeling bad for him after all he's done....why couldn't he have just left the city with her like he said he was going too. Just when I was starting to think that there could be a good life without him I'm back to wanting him back above anything else.

This whole thing is just not fair on the ones left behind,
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Old 08-01-2011, 04:48 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Bit of a breakthrough

You'll keep experiencing these ups and downs, trust me. It only stop with time and the will to make it stop. I know it's been told to you before, but you really need to just focus on yourself. Just know that you're stronger than this and you will make it.
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