Re: Going through Seperation following wife's affair
This is a very tough situation you're in right now. So many spouses appear like they had forgiven their partner for past sins, but in reality is really just harboring it. I feel like this is the case for your wife, who appeared like she has forgiven you for what you've done in the past but is really just stuck in the situation at that time. kids, no job, low self esteem, etc. She's only 31 and is too young to be in a mid-life crisis, if there ever is really such a thing as mid-life crisis. My advice to you is be the best that you can be. You can't do anything at this point, begging, pleading and asking her to rebuild your marriage is only going to fall on deaf ears. She has someone right now who is presenting her a better option than your marriage, it's simply the social exchange theory of marriage, a spouse who feels like the grass is greener on the other side, will naturally go to that place. Work on improving yourself, I know it's tough, been there, done that. Work out, exercise is a natural way of letting your endorphins flow, it's a natural stress and pain fighter. Eat healthy and take care of yourself, love your children the best way you can and best way the current situation allows you. It's going to be horrible during the night, when loneliness sets in, and the bout of "what ifs" starts creeping in. But each day is a path to getting better. Let your wife be at this moment. When you came to a place where you have your confidence and strength again, she may think that she was a fool for not fighting for your marriage, or she may not. But whatever you do, do it for yourself from now on.
good luck and pray for strength.