Hello Sham, just made an account to make this post. Talk about life going full circle. i was feeling sorry for you all this while while she was going about not giving a f@%k. You were waiting on her to apologize and now you don't even care. Now I feel bad for her. I think she is beginning to realize her actions. The OM was real scum though. he f%$ked over literally and emotionally. But that is Karma for you. Maybe you should let her know that she should stop acting that you are still together(as much as it stings)
Thanks...I do care, of course, it's just not my focus at this point. And the OM is dealing with his own mess at home (and yeah he's a total scumbag), so he's having to realize the gravity of his actions too. Doesn't make me feel good, but it's not my fault. It's his and my STBXW's for making this reality for the four of us. Posted via Mobile Device
My heart is still palpitating from that game. Wow...just epic. Posted via Mobile Device
Shamwow, I caught some of your original posting when you had a thread in a different section. Haven't read all the post here, but yeah, that game...no words, man. No words.
What's up Sham? I hope you're out banging your new girlfriend. Happy Halloween.
The woman happens to be a person with feelings just like Sham. She does not deserved to be treated like a prop to a betrayed man's ego. She did nothing to deserve that type of treatment. She is being friendly and lending a sympathetic ear.
Sham I hope that if you view this woman as a piece of aZZ to temporarily relieve your pain of being betrayed by your wife then tell her so. She may actually not mind being a notch in your belt to impress the chorus. You will only know that if she agrees. Knowing how humans are, and she is human dispute having a very coveted vag, she is looking for more than a chance to be pumped and dumped.
. With the amount of sympathy and support that the TAM community has given over these months, it would disappointing if this turned into a feeding frenzy. Just remember, you have been hurt so please don't hurt others. I think it is more honourable to leave women alone at this point until you get your life sorted put.
You know in your heart of hearts that you cannot offer this girl or anyone what she is looking for but she does not know that because she is naive. She does not realize that she is just a sidenote a drama orchestrated by a chorus of dispassionate advisors who don't give a fig about her.
You have acted well, so please don't start down the road of involving innocent women in your search to feel better about yourself. This is not a solution to your problems. You have to search for validation within yourself, scoring a half dozen women in the next few weeks would impress some if your aim is low. Posted via Mobile Device
Catherine - Agree with you completely. She knows exactly what my situation is, and I am not going for notches, I'm enjoying my time with a beautiful girl who likes spending time with me. No worries, I'm not approaching this from a player perspective. I'm acutely aware of my position of power to hurt someone new...especially in a rebound situation. So I'm treading carefully, but also really having fun getting out there. Though I do have friends that seem to say I should be making the rounds...they're just pointing out the option. I know who I am though (though who knows what options will be in front of me going forward - I'm trying to be a blank slate. If I meet a no-strings notcher, who knows?). Thanks for your thoughts...
Edit: Meantime, I am still married, so that grounds me in the dating world...though the clock is ticking. Just got the revised draft of the D papers and am sending over to W for her review. She could drag it out and argue over things now, or I could be single in two days. Who knows?
Plainly said, respect yourself and respect others.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Larry Bilotta
It’s not sex a man wants, its sexual intimacy. Sexual intimacy is NOT sex. Sex pleases only the man, but sexual intimacy is all about a man’s ability to physically please a woman
Knowing how humans are, and she is human dispute having a very coveted vag, she is looking for more than a chance to be pumped and dumped.
Assuming that Sham doesn't force himself on her, or falsely proclaim his undying love for her, wouldn't any woman willing to hop in the sack with a man she's known for a few weeks be implicitly agreeing to a sexual relationship without any commitment?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Catherine602
Just remember, you have been hurt so please don't hurt others. I think it is more honourable to leave women alone at this point until you get your life sorted put.
I was under the impression that women were free, perhaps even encouraged in some circles, to decline to have sex with a man. Are women so dimwitted that they will believe that short-term sexual relationships obligate commitment from a man?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Catherine602
You know in your heart of hearts that you cannot offer this girl or anyone what she is looking for but she does not know that because she is naive. She does not realize that she is just a sidenote a drama orchestrated by a chorus of dispassionate advisors who don't give a fig about her.
Perhaps she's not naive. Perhaps she is a smart, capable, independent, sexually adventurous women who is interested in a little physical action with a man who has been completely open about his marital status. I wouldn't automatically assume that she, or women in general, must be protected from the big, bad world, by men who have very little invested in them.
Assuming that Sham doesn't force himself on her, or falsely proclaim his undying love for her, wouldn't any woman willing to hop in the sack with a man she's known for a few weeks be implicitly agreeing to a sexual relationship without any commitment?
I was under the impression that women were free, perhaps even encouraged in some circles, to decline to have sex with a man. Are women so dimwitted that they will believe that short-term sexual relationships obligate commitment from a man?
Perhaps she's not naive. Perhaps she is a smart, capable, independent, sexually adventurous women who is interested in a little physical action with a man who has been completely open about his marital status. I wouldn't automatically assume that she, or women in general, must be protected from the big, bad world, by men who have very little invested in them.
What!! Well why are there so many player books and web sites selling programs on how to persuade women to be pumped and dumped or used?
Nice try. Men know that very well which women is looking for sex only and which are looking for someone special. If a woman is looking for sex only she is upfront about it.
The problem comes when the man wants nothing special but he is unwilling to forgo her exercising her choice to engage in casual sex or not by hiding his intensions.
Women don't need protection from an honest man but she does from dishonest men which is exactly what I said above. Yes, some women are naive to think that sex means love because that what men tell them. That's not being dimwitted that is being used.
Maybe you are right, women are dimwitted - that's why so many women stop having sex after a couple of years of marriage. They finally get it - sex means he gets his rocks off and is otherwise meaningless.
She can do what she likes but it is for her to decide.
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Re: Go time...and time to go. Sucks... 
