One of them is cheating on the other, right? I thought they broke up
Well, it doesn't sound like a honeymoon, that's for sure. I think XW threw him under the bus after the incident the other night, as she was looking to get a ride from his place before he got out of jail. Don't know any more than that.
Her best gf texted me today asking if I'd been in touch with XW, worrying about her. I just said she had texted me the other day after a bad night, and she sounded pretty rough.
Really trying to avoid any of the drama here...it's up to her friends to lift her up now.
I presume her gf had been in touch with her...or had at least heard about the drama. I can see an intervention if this keeps up, as some of her work colleagues have been concerned about the wine intake for a while. Can't imagine her being suicidal, but clearly she's really down...I think she needs IC, stat. Posted via Mobile Device
She'll be fine, prob just a bender. She's feeling sorry for herself and not taking positive steps to fix it. Hope she changes that soon, for everyone's sanity. Posted via Mobile Device
ShamWOW!!! I started reading your initial thread early last week, and just now finished this entire thread! WOW, you have been down a long, hard road in such a short amount of time.
I love the way you have totally changed yourself, inside and out and are moving on as a new man! Good for you!
I'm SO glad to hear that things with you and "little red" are going well. Just take it day by day - of course you know that already. She's a lucky girl to have such a sweet man by her side, at least as her friend. You seem very loyal and true; don't ever lose that and keep moving forward.
I'll be moving the last of my things from the house later today. The short sale is approved on the house, closing on Friday. I have to write a sizeable check for my half of the short sale settlement, as is my responsibility as original deed holder...but other than that it's done and out of my hands. And it's a very liberating feeling to be cutting this tie with XW and my old life. Now our only real ties are the dogs (and that's minimal, as they are mine now).
Was over filling a dumpster with XW the other day in prep for the move, and we got along just fine. Good to be able to do this stuff without anger or insanity from either end.
Two things:
- She told me she's having health concerns (racing pulse, dizziness, shakiness, etc) and thinks it's related to her drinking, which has been at an elevated level for some time. It doesn't sound like she's seeking professional help, but has been going through withdrawal, etc, when she tries to stop cold turkey. If nothing else I guess it's good sign that she's starting to talk about it as a problem. Let's see if she does something about it. Hope so.
- She finally asked how I found out my evidence. Out of the blue, and totally casual with no anger, she just said "So...did you hack my phone then?" I just said "Nope". Silence. Then I said "Do you really want to know?" to which she then said no. And then yes. I thought about it for a sec (would this be helping her cheat in the future??) but finally figured at least I'd give her a little peace of mind that I'm not spying on her still. Told her that her phone or computer were never compromised, but that texts don't really go away when you delete them. She stopped me and said she didn't want to know any more...so she still probably doesn't know that her backup drive sunk her fantasy world. Whatever. Not sure if that's worth mentioning, but after 6 months she finally asked how I busted her. (She still has never technically apologized either...and I'm okay with that now. She's said what she did was wrong, but that's about the extent of what I'll ever hear. I know her well enough to know that. C'est la vie. At least I exposed, so she'll have to soul search in regards to dealing with family/friends eventually. Maybe she'll get therapy someday.)
I'm feeling great. Been awhile since I had a rough night or did any painful reminiscing. Still doing IC though. And things with Red are going...well...just great. 2.0 all the way, feels totally different going into a new relationship with the knowledge I've gained. She treats me like a king. And she's getting the best of me too. Taking it slow though, really saw myself floating the field for a while...but maybe that's just not my MO, and why mess with a good thing?
I realize this should probably be moving to Life After Divorce, but haven't decided if I need to start a new thread...my venting is much less frequent these days. We shall see.
Endless thanks to everyone again, for helping me through the sh*tstorm that you all saw coming. I am eternally grateful.
I'm feeling great. Been awhile since I had a rough night or did any painful reminiscing. Still doing IC though. And things with Red are going...well...just great. 2.0 all the way, feels totally different going into a new relationship with the knowledge I've gained. She treats me like a king. And she's getting the best of me too. Taking it slow though, really saw myself floating the field for a while...but maybe that's just not my MO, and why mess with a good thing?
That is so great to hear!!! Keep up the good work and keep moving forward. Everything in the past is no longer worth mentioning. You have a bright new future ahead of you!!
I realize this should probably be moving to Life After Divorce, but haven't decided if I need to start a new thread...my venting is much less frequent these days. We shall see.
"You're probably the best guy out there. Never forget it, never settle!"
Not sure what to do with that. Will respond eventually, but it's interesting to know she's at least having some realizations about what's been lost in her life by her choices. Guessing she's finding out there are a lot of wankers out there posing as potential partners.
And lord knows I'm not anywhere near the best - but I can definitely say I'm trying.
80Likes
Re: Go time...and time to go. Sucks... 
and are moving on as a new man! Good for you! 
