Re: Separated wife only wants to be friends
Hello Andy and sorry to read about your situation. I don't know your whole story.
You say 5 years ago you two had separated. What was the agreement then ? Did you both agree to see other people ? You said she dressed provocatively (hunting for men) and then found and slept with other guys back then - more than one guy I take it. Did she do this alone or with friends who helped her ? How long did this go on for ? Was this something you knew about at the time ? Were you sleeping with other women too ? Was the thinking back then that the separation was a precursor to divorce ? You say she did a "180" and wanted you back when you found someone. Was this the first person you found ? If so, you made a colossal mistake back then. She had gone out, tested the grass on the other side, had her fun, got her rocks off and then made sure you didn't go anywhere else. AND YOU THINK (SOMEHOW) THAT SHE LOVED YOU ?!?!?!?!?
I am trying to understand what was so different back then to now.
Now, five years on, she has asked you to leave and YOU JUST COMPLIED ?!?!?!?!? Unbelievable! You that is, not her. She is acting true to form - you, on the other hand, do not appear to be learning anything and have your head firmly buried in the ground!
Wake up - you should not have moved out. You should not put yourself under any unnecessary financial stress (or any other unnecessary stress). You should iron out legally a custody agreement. You should understand that your marriage is over (has been for some time now) and you need to start behaving like an adult who is going through divorce - protect yourself and your custody/kids. This includes who can be around your kids etc.
Stop wallowing in your misery, and start taking positive steps. What would happen if you moved back into the house ? Don't tell me about living in misery, because that is what you are doing living outside of your house.
Wake up man, before it is too late.
This is my quest, to follow that star
No matter how hopeless, no matter how far
To fight for the right, without question or pause
To be willing to march into Hell, for a Heavenly cause