Wife left my girls and me for a coworker - Page 5 - Talk About Marriage
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post #61 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-03-2016, 02:22 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by LadybugMomma View Post
In due time, she'll get bored of this new man and she'll move onto another victim. I'm pretty positive of that.

I simply have zero respect for a woman who can easily bail on her children like your wife did.

What you need to do is forget about her sorry a$$. Focus on healing yourself and take incredible care, love, nurture and protect your girls! Don't involve or allow them to be involved in this disaster their mother has going on. Be their voice. And stand up for yourself.
Its there mother bringing this disaster into there lifes if she's so in love and happy with this new person , why does she have to force her daughters to meet him if they don't want to. Is she looking for approval of them , why can't she just live her life and leave them alone.

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post #62 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-03-2016, 02:43 PM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

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Its there mother bringing this disaster into there lifes if she's so in love and happy with this new person , why does she have to force her daughters to meet him if they don't want to. Is she looking for approval of them , why can't she just live her life and leave them alone.
You can prevent this by taking legal action Tomas. Find the money to get a lawyer and lawyer up!

He can place restraining orders against your wife introducing partners to your girls. It can all be done. If she breaks the restraining order, it will help you with full custody of your girls.

Actions, actions and more actions speak louder than words Tomas. Take action now!

Good things come to those who wait...greater things come to those who get off their a$$ and do anything to make it happen.
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post #63 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-03-2016, 03:06 PM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

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I'm not trying to get into another relationship I know now I'm not ready for such a thing. The only thing is I'm struggling some raising my girls on my own .even though I was doing it almost myself when we were still together. Its hard trying to keep my 2 daughters happy I have to comfort them while trying to deal with my own heart break. Trust me this is the hardest situation I have had to deal with.
Tomas. You will never have an answer for why. Until you accept she is gone (it's the hard part, and takes a while), you will beat your head against the wall thinking about why and what you could have done to prevent this. You could have done nothing. The sad fact is that your wife is a serial cheater, and a chronically discontented person.

Once you accept she is gone, and get back in the groove, and the emotional storm in your mind is over,you will then be able to see clearly what your wife is and why it's not all your fault.

99% of women want their husband to put the children first in their life. Yes, this is just an excuse. She's a cheating **** is why she cheated.
And that is also why she will be miserable no matter what happens. You need her gone.
Why did the snake bite me, the boy asked? Grandfather said "because he is a snake, sonny".

Accept your wife for what she is, and divorce her.
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post #64 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-03-2016, 03:15 PM Thread Starter
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I'm not trying to get into another relationship I know now I'm not ready for such a thing. The only thing is I'm struggling some raising my girls on my own .even though I was doing it almost myself when we were still together. Its hard trying to keep my 2 daughters happy I have to comfort them while trying to deal with my own heart break. Trust me this is the hardest situation I have had to deal with.
Tomas. You will never have an answer for why. Until you accept she is gone (it's the hard part, and takes a while), you will beat your head against the wall thinking about why and what you could have done to prevent this. You could have done nothing. The sad fact is that your wife is a serial cheater, and a chronically discontented person.

Once you accept she is gone, and get back in the groove, and the emotional storm, you will then be able to see clearly what your wife is, and why it's not all your fault.

99% of women want their husband to put the children first in their life. Yes, this is just an excuse. She's a cheating **** is why she cheated.
And that is also why she will be miserable no matter what happens. You need her gone.
Why did the snake bite me, the boy asked? Grandfather said "because he is a snake, sonny".

Accept your wife for what she is, and divorce her.
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Yup, I hope for her sake she found who makes her happy and its worth it for her what she putting her girls through, time will tell if it comes to bite her in the ass ,but don't worry I would never take her back even if she tried coming back which I doubt, she's done the damage already
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post #65 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 08:25 AM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

Remember we are pressing you to start some type of legal action because until that happens she is perfectly within her rights to introduce her children to whomever she likes. You cannot stop her.

Call the county bar association and ask for a referral.

In youth it was a way I had, to do my best to please, And change, with every passing lad to suit his theories.
But now I know the things I know, and do the things I do; And if you do not like me so, To hell, my love, with you! --Dorothy Parker
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post #66 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 08:41 AM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

Since she has left, I would have a no relationship discussion rule. I think she likes to have her cake and eat it too, being with her boyfriend and then discussing your failing as if you two were still together. Simply I do not care to discuss it is fine. Get better clothes, work out, get confident, and go on with your own life, and let her fight over money and other things with broke minimum wage new boyfriend. Right now, I would exclude any discussion except as necessary to deal with children.
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post #67 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 08:47 AM Thread Starter
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I found out last night she applied for food stamps and isn't even using for the girls she's been using it to feed herself and her AP!!! I'm the one that's been supporting the girls by myself! Should I report her for fraud?
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post #68 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 09:16 AM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

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I found out last night she applied for food stamps and isn't even using for the girls she's been using it to feed herself and her AP!!! I'm the one that's been supporting the girls by myself! Should I report her for fraud?
Document everything! Every...little...bit.

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"Our ability to feel joy is directly related to how much pain we are willing to feel." - Mavash.

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post #69 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 10:22 AM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

Have you filed for divorce yet? If not, get it done, and push the divorce through to completion ASAP.

She's still in a dopamine-induced affair fog, so use that to your advantage -- you want the divorce to be over and done with well before the shine starts to come off the apple. You want her 110% focused on her relationship w/ Mr. Minimumwage McFoodstamps.

Limit contact to ONLY topics concerning the kids or the divorce, and use e-mail for that. In other words, no more texting, and no more phone calls that don't involve emergencies w/ the kids. This will help you to disengage and detach, as well as ensuring that everything is documented and easily accessible. Oh, and change passwords to everything -- e-mail, social media, etc.

Prepare yourself for a life w/o her; to that end, read up on and implement the 180.

Virginia: "Why can't you kids leave well enough alone? Everything was fine until you started digging around."

Burt: "You sound like a Scooby Doo villain."
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post #70 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 10:37 AM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

Forget about reporting her, just document it and let your lawyer advice and handle the situation. When food stamps run out or they can't buy other things with them, she is going to come and take the girls away from you and then hit you with child support. Guess who the child support money is going for?

Please don't delay, act today!


Good things come to those who wait...greater things come to those who get off their a$$ and do anything to make it happen.
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post #71 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 10:41 AM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

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Yup, I hope for her sake she found who makes her happy and its worth it for her what she putting her girls through, time will tell if it comes to bite her in the ass ,but don't worry I would never take her back even if she tried coming back which I doubt, she's done the damage already
No, you don't get it. NOBODY "finds someone that can "make them happy". She isn't happy with herself, and likely never will be. You, nor anyone else will ever "make her happy".
That's why she cheats--- unhappiness. And that's not your fault.
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post #72 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 10:49 AM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

Do you not have any family or friends?
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post #73 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 10:58 AM
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Re: Wife left my girls and me for a coworker

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I found out last night she applied for food stamps and isn't even using for the girls she's been using it to feed herself and her AP!!! I'm the one that's been supporting the girls by myself! Should I report her for fraud?
Document and use it for full custody. Better file as soon as you can and get this moving for your kids sake.
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post #74 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 12:12 PM Thread Starter
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Do you not have any family or friends?
Yes I have a sister and my father, and just 1 really good friend. Why ?
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post #75 of 379 (permalink) Old 06-04-2016, 12:20 PM Thread Starter
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Funny thing I just found out that she's already planning on getting married , she's hoping that guys gonna pop the question or he's leading her to believe that, man she seriously lost her marbles or really in her fog
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