He has also asked them if he can send them photos of his penis to see if they think it is good enough and has asked them for photos in return.... I found out that five more girls had been affected by this behavior as well, during our college years, which was not all that long ago.
Fallen, yes, I agree that you are now describing symptoms for narcissism. I caution that NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) traits are not something -- like chickenpox -- that a person "has" or "doesn't have." Instead, these symptoms constitute a "spectrum" disorder, which means every adult on the planet occasionally exhibits all NPD traits to some degree (albeit at a low level if the person is healthy). At issue, then, is not whether your H exhibits NPD traits. Of course he does. We all do.
Rather, at issue is whether he exhibits those traits at a strong and persistent level (i.e., is on the upper end of the NPD spectrum). Not having met him, I cannot answer that question. I nonetheless believe you can spot any strong NPD warning signs that are present if you take a little time to learn which behaviors are on the list.
Strictly speaking, the attention seeking and provocative behaviors you describe are warning signs for Histrionic PD
. Like NPD, HPD is one of the four personality disorders referred to as the "Cluster B" disorders. (These four disorders -- also called the "Dramatic PDs -- include BPD and ASPD as well.) Since 2012, I've been thinking of HPD as a subcategory of NPD. The American Psychiatric Community still seems to be on a path to eliminate HPD as a separate category and to include it as an exhibitionistic attention-seeking subtype of NPD.
This consolidation would allow what they call the current 'grandiose male-dominated' NPD to be supplemented by a more female-dominated attention-seeking subtype, described by a behavior pattern of (1) explicit attention-seeking; (2) outer-directedness; (3) self-dramatization; (4) dependency on others' attention; (5) presentation of self through sexualized means; and (6) easily emotionally triggered. Although HPD primarily overlaps with NPD, to a lesser extent it also overlaps with BPD. For more explanation, see Charles Pull's discussion at MedScape