With as young as your little one is, the only thing I would say to do is love her. Don't ever speak negatively of her father, no matter how much frustration you have with him. She will grow up understanding that your home is just the norm for her.
Thanks, I would absolutely do that. My wife would too. We both do now and so I know that would not change.
My divorce did a real job on both of my daughters. They both had promising futures, both did well in school and during and after the divorce their grades plunged. My eldest never made it to college, my youngest was a high school drop out.
Suffice it to say that divorce is at best, not a positive experience, there's going to be damage but it can be minimized if the parents approach it with their children's best interests in mind as their top priority.
Unfortunately most people approach divorce with the $$ in mind.
How old were your children when you divorced?
I am at the tail end of my divorce after a seventeen year marriage. I have a fifteen year old daughter and an eleven year old son. Because of your daughters age there will be much she will not be aware of, unlike my own, but here is the best advice I can give you. Always be congruent in word, action and emotion. She may not be able to understand the situation or the information being given to her, but she will always be able to sense behavior or words that are incongruous with the reality she is able to perceive. Always keep your child's well being as your top priority; regardless of your own feelings or wishes, this will ensure that when she grows up and asks for information you have nothing to be ashamed of. In other words, during the divorce, don't do or say anything that you would be embarrassed or ashamed if she ever found out. Having integrity of mind, heart and action will bring her and you peace now and in the long run.
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Thanks. Sounds like great advice. I want to get this over while she is young. I do not relish the idea of divorcing when as old as your children. That seems like it would be significantly harder.
Great advice however sometimes/oftentimes the parent isn't in touch with the reality of the situation so they just may do what you caution against, without even realizing it.
That is good for me to consider.
I seperated from my daughter's dad when she was not quite 3 years old. There was an adjustment period over the first 6 months, I'd say. She did really well after that. Her dad and I were able to work together though on making things as easy and amicable as possible for her. We were flexible about unexpected things, about holidays and family functions, etc.
As for my own divorced child experience... when I was a kid, I was always hoping my parents would divorce. Took my mom til I was 14 to finally file. It was a rough divorce because my dad fought every step of the way but it was worth it in the end to finally have peace in our house.
Your kids can be fine, it takes the adults working toghether with the kids' best interest in mind at all times.
That sounds promising for me. I think my wife and I would work ok regarding out daughter.