Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: The Frozen North
Re: Wife moved out (she needs space but says she loves me?)
I am going to parrot what others have said here: She is fence sitting without giving you the benefit of even stating your case. I believe that you should let her know that you are not prepared to have this situation continue. Consequently, and this should be made plain to her, you are seeing a lawyer about separation leading to divorce. The second consequence is that once you have a legal separation, you are going to start dating. You will have all of your answers fairly quickly after those pronouncements.
I have a client whose wife acted similarly, she was fence sitting, and found it difficult to make decisions. He basically asked if he could start dating again as she did not seem to want to move in one direction or another. That question scared the bejabbers out of her, as she was quite comfortable having him at her convenience, or rather, he was a convenience for her. She did not have to maintain a home or split duties on parenting. He parented on his days and she pretty much let the kid do what he wanted on her days. She went to work and kept her salary, but he was paying for the marital home and all child expenses. She could pass him off as her husband when it suited her, and when it didn't, she basically treated him as an interloper. The threat of a new love replacing her, and the threat that her lifestyle would be that of a broke unmarried middle-aged woman wised her up quickly.