mrspink

Today i went on my husbands computer and found he was talking to his ex. even saying he loves her. I of course told him it was over, and he went into detail saying he stopped loving me a couple months ago (even though nothing has changed and we have been married 2 years) and that he was going to break up with me when we got to texas. see were in new york for one more month and with only one car. We have a 7th month old so i havent been working. Now im heart broken and stuck with having to look at him everyday knowing he just stopped loving me for no reason. Any ADVICE on how the hell im suppose to make it through this would be very appreciative .... and he just got back from a deployment 2 months ago.

Sparkles422

See a lawyer and then make your decision based on what the law says.

Have you sought MC? Have you had a calm discussion with him?

HerToo

Go to counseling for yourself, and for the sake of the child. It's highly unlikely that you are the only one to have gone through this, so a counselor can help.

Your focus has to be on you AND your child. Not him. Do not leave your child alone with him if you can. Leave your child with a friend or relative instead. He could end up taking the child and say that you abandoned him and your child. Don't give him that chance.

I'm so sorry you are going through such a mess.

KatiezMomma

I'm in the same situation, my daughter and I have to stay here until we find a place. In the mean time he is flaunting his OW in my face, texting, facebooking, talking on the phone. Super classy guy. Its hard to do but just concentrate on your child and yourself and think of him as an annoying roommate.

Suemolly

When my husband told me he wanted out, I too had to continue living with him for 1 month till he moved out. That 1 month was the hardest period of grief. Not so much because I knew he was going to move out, but mainly the arrogance, indifference, rudeness, tactlessness he was putting up to me during that month. Suddenly I was made to feel like I was a piece of burden to him, a barrier to his happiness, someone standing in his way to a better life. And all these while he dated a bunch of women like I no longer was his wife, came home late each night reeking of perfume, standing outside the house frequently for his private phone chats, smiling and beaming...while my world shattered beyond any pain I ever knew.

But these things have a way of turning it round for us. Because each time I miss him now, all I have to do is think back what a horrible piece of scum he was for hurting me like that...and I instantly wish to move on without him.

Honestly, what I can say is - the sooner they get out of the house and leave you, the better. Try to go out often while he's there. Because they can act like the biggest a****** when they suddenly don't want you anymore, so its better to avoid them.

cyan

This is so flippin' true, Suemolly. I so hardheartedly agree (from experience, of course).

mrspink

WOW thanks for all the advice! it really helps. He hasnt been an ass to me yet, hes trying to be understanding. We talked eerything out and he said he doesn't even want anything with the other person and that all our issues could have been solved if he ever just opened up to me. However he wont attempt reconciliation and makes it very clear how bad he wants out, And there was NO signs of this. NONE at all it was all good then just one day he didn't want it anymore. Im sure theres more going on then he tells me but hes still being a good guy and father which just makes it hard!

THanks soooo much for all the advice though because i really needed it at this time in my life.