Did you provide paperwork to prove what you told the lawyer? Or did you just tell her verbally?
Yep, you need a new attorney.
I provided the paperwork. How do I find the right attorney? That is my challenge now. They have to be a fighter and also very familiar with commingling. This week I will start interviewing. I will have to ask them all the specific questions about my situation.
On Monday I meet with a different CDFP who I asked to figure the amount of CP in MY IRA. The result was very different that the horrible CDFP I am using now and am firing. The errors were in my husbands favor, of course. The new CDFP seemed to know a lot about the local attorneys so I am going to ask her for help finding one.
To clarify: Right now I have a lawyer and my STBXH and I are using a 'neutral' CDFP that I found who is destroying me and who cannot do a simple spreadsheet. My STBXH supposedly does not know I am using the lawyer. She is on retainer but is being used by me for questions and has not filed paperwork.
The CDFP started out saying things like "You're going to be fine, I have your back." The pre-settlement paperwork she gave me looked great. But as soon as my STBXH announced in the meeting that a huge chunk of money went into his brokerage fund that was trust fund money, all that changed and she told him that because he paid for things from that brokerage fund and even though there was CP money in that fund, everything he paid for out of that find was his sole and separate. She asked for no proof, but she and my husband agreed that it was trust fund money because what else could it be? We had only been married 2 years, he did have a trust fund, he did not make enough to have that kind of money back them. And then she was insisting that I agree (then and there) that the brokerage fund was entirely his sole and separate property. I refused. No mu STBXH is convinced that everything is his...I have no bargaining power at all thanks to this CDFP.
Now my attorney is planning to have lunch with her (the two have had quite a bit of contact during this process.) The purpose is for my attorney to feel out the CFDP and see if I can still get a fair shot at getting a fair settlement. But that makes no sense as the damage had been done and the attorney has tried to explain things before with no good results. The attorney is trying to say that evidence must be presented by my husband. However, now the attorney is backtracking on things like house ownership. The business about my name must be on the deed or it is his sole and separate is one example.
It's such a mess. And CP sure seems to work in favor of the person who set up the assets in their favor.
Thank you so much!!