husband says doesn't love me but he "cares", is that enough?
we re a 33y/0.couple, no children, been married 7, toghether 8, about 6 months ago husband had breakdown and said he wasn't sure what he felt about me, that he wasn't sure if he loved me enough, all that was said in surprise , I didn't feel or seen that something was wrong, same week we went to two appt with a therapyst, he tried to conect us physically, at the time I felt it had work but a month later, husband started being distant, not saying love you or any romantic gesture. He went to his country a week on December because his dad died and he tough that's where everything came from, I expected after the trip he will come back better but he didn't
January these year my mom came to visit for a week and he was more distant you could see he wasn't happy coming home, and when saying hi to me , he would give me a kiss on the cheek but I felt it not honest at all. At that time sex was like once a week but a quickly, no kisses no passion, of course he hasn't been romantic , not even hand touching
After my mom left he said wanted to try another therapist, we each had a appt alone and then one together , I liked her , the conclusioN back then was we were going to try being friends again and reconnect again, he wanted to sleep on the couch, and also the agreement was to continue therapy
February everythIng continue the same, he bough pain for alcohol the exterior of the house which gave me hope ,but the situation continues same, we behave like roommates, no real emotional connection , no real important talk, 0 %,physical contact,
I started on January doing things for myself , exercise, trying to meet new people because truly I have been doing everything with him and I hadn't a strong personality bymyself which I is true and he said did t like about me.
I noticed he didn't go back to therapy
About two weeks ago I started realizing I m young, and deserve better, someone who cares about me, find me attractive, wants to kiss me, hug me, not everything is sex I know buts that's part of us human and to me that's marriage, I went back to the therapist last week, told her pretty much I would wait until July and if I see no change I would tell him to divorce
But this week I'm confused, don't know if to try a real separation (living In another place) before making the decision , don't know if Is a rush decision...
like how much to wait, Are about him but now I feel sad and upset that a son per my opinion he is not trying,,, he is a good guy in the sense no drugs or addictions, no partying, no abuse, he is good so I'm afraid to take the next step... what do you think
FYI he hasn't and is not cheated , thanks