She treats me horribly but i still want her back, why? - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
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post #16 of 22 (permalink) Old 03-25-2017, 03:44 PM
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Re: She why?

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Originally Posted by dadofdaughters View Post
I've been separated for 3 months and just received a temporary custody order and awaiting a final trial and my ex got sole physical custody of our 2 young girls, 5 and 18 months. Since the day we split up and I moved out she has been keeping the girls from me whenever she gets angry or wants to upset me. In the beginning she would give me mixed signals about wanting to get back together only to shut me down when I tried.

Recently things have gotten worse. The weeks leading up to our conciliation hearing I made several attempts to discuss custody with her as we both wanted to avoid the courts and all the lawyer fees but she would sabotage the conversation by arguing. We would argue almost every time we spoke during the transition with dropping off and picking up the children.

Now that the temporary order is in place, and its in her favor, she refuses to talk with me at all about how to avoid trial and come to a better agreement. I have a feeling that she is trying to keep my involvement as little as possible. She wants me to see them every other weekend only. She has been holding the children away from me and extremely disrespectful and rude and at times manipulating.

Everyone I talk to clearly sees that she has issues and think she has developed a mental problem, including out therapist. Everyone tells me to move on, stop talking to her, don't let her get to me, etc.
I just can't. She broke up with me, has used my girls as weapons against me. Acted in such a horrible way towards me and even tried everything she could to make sure the courts granted me as little time with my girls as possible.

I still want to find a way to get back with her. For many reasons and I realize this is part of my problem. The thought of having to have my children part time forever scares me. Paying child support while trying to maintain my own household. The thought of her getting into another relationship and eventually living with another man who will be with my girls more than me because she gets more time is also more than I can bare at this time

I started seeing another woman but I am not interested. I cant stop wanting to get back with my ex and she doesn't want to and treats me horrible. Why I want her back and cant get over her I just cant figure out.

I definitely love her more than anyone I have ever been with but I cant understand how I can take this abuse and still want to be with her.
Please stop wanting to be with this cruel manipulative woman, (I despise anyone who uses their own children as a weapon), but fight like crazy for those children. Fight to have them half of the time or at least every weekend. Be the best dad you can, don't date while you are still in this mess.

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post #17 of 22 (permalink) Old 03-25-2017, 03:50 PM
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Re: She treats me horribly but i still want her back, why?

Why do you want her back?

Because you have no self esteem.
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post #18 of 22 (permalink) Old 03-25-2017, 05:19 PM
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Re: She treats me horribly but i still want her back, why?

Maybe he wants her back because when he loses her, he loses his kids, his home, most of his income and half of his property.

I bet if he could have all of those things, and just not have her he'd have an easier time of it.
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post #19 of 22 (permalink) Old 03-25-2017, 06:09 PM Thread Starter
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Re: She treats me horribly but i still want her back, why?

Adiron,

I guess I could have clarified on this so there is assumption that needed to develop a mental problem to invoke sympathy among readers, because breaking up with the father of your children and then deciding your going to keep the children away from father because you don't like him anymore and you can isn't reason enough to empathize with my position. Post Pardom depression and extreme elevated estrogen levels were terms thrown around buy a therapist we both see often and developed during her second pregnancy.

As far as what she is telling everyone she knows, Im pretty sure it's the same thing she is telling me she discovered about me . He is a narcissistic, emotionally abusive person who is incapable of love. He tricked me into loving him, drained me emotionally and physically until I had no more to give. He is emotionless and self centered and only cares about himself. Oh, did I mention he is bi polar ******* with manic tendencies.

I can tell you this because I assure you other than being diagnosed with Bi Polar disorder as a teenager, and being guilty of being an ******* from time to time, the rest of that is a far stretch to say the least.

I appreciate the feedback and I realize there could be some co dependency here. I am honestly getting tired of allowing myself to get stuck in these emotions and wish I was able to not care at all about how she feels, what she thinks about me, and who she may or may not be sleeping with. I know the thought of another man moving in to her home where my daughters sleep when she has them more than I do, so by default that guy lives with my girls more than I do is the hardest thought to comprehend.
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post #20 of 22 (permalink) Old 03-25-2017, 06:41 PM
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Re: She treats me horribly but i still want her back, why?

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Originally Posted by dadofdaughters View Post
I know the thought of another man moving in to her home where my daughters sleep when she has them more than I do, so by default that guy lives with my girls more than I do is the hardest thought to comprehend.
I couldn't even imagine.
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post #21 of 22 (permalink) Old 03-28-2017, 10:00 AM
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Re: She treats me horribly but i still want her back, why?

Stop trying to discuss things with her. Let your lawyer know you have concerns about her mental health and request she have an evaluation. Also let the lawyer know she is withholding your children from you. Once your custody plan is legally in place, she will no longer be able to do that, she will be in contempt of court if she tries.

Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.

http://goodmenproject.com/featured-c...ionships-fiff/
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post #22 of 22 (permalink) Old 03-29-2017, 11:17 PM
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Re: She why?

Do u treat her bad too and not realize it

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