To move back or move on?
My husband and I have been separated since the end of November, I am devastated. Our real downfall started when my sister passed away two years ago, I slipped into a deep depression. My husband and I grew further and further apart, he didn't want to stay at home with someone so sad and I didn't feel like going out. On the occasion when I did go out with him it would be to a bar we frequent. I made a horrible mistake and kissed another guy at this bar, I don't even know why. He saw us, kicked me out of the house that night and I moved to NC (we live in FL) the next day to stay with my mom. He threatened if I moved back into the house he would file for divorce immediately, so I have stayed away. He has since dated other women (I have dated no one) and says he has only kissed one of them. He barely wants to talk to me and a couple of months ago said he thinks we should divorce, after crying together on the phone he stated he wanted to try one more thing and see a pastor about our marriage. He has been twice, but won't really budge on moving forward.
He states the past couple years have been bad in our marriage, it felt like we were roommates and he doesn't think our marriage can be saved. He is in a very "me, me, me" place and doesn't feel like fighting. I want to move back, into my own apartment to be near him and try to work things out. He states he can not promise he will spend any time with me , and doesn't think it's a good idea. I feel if I don't move down, I'm just giving up. I fear if I do, it will be a constant rejection, that I don't know that I can handle. Any thoughts, ideas? Please help. Any advise would be helpful.