02-04-2012, 12:56 PM
Join Date: Jan 2012
| | Re: Newly separated and ok with it
Sounds like you're handling things well...and how couldn't you be? You are less stressed, your parenting more confidently, your sons grades are positively being affected...ultimately, you are happier right now.
However, your husband, is not handling things well. He sounds desperate, pleading, getting angry and demanding...keep in mind, this is very common, so don't hold it against him too much. He is just hurt.
However, he needs to man up, give you space and time...and stop trying to get back together, and start working on himself. If he can do this, and work on his own issues successfully...things will fall into place as they should. Otherwise...he's just trying to continue the EXACT same situation, that you didn't want to be in.
It's difficult, what you two are doing, even if you're ok with it... there's times, i'm sure, where you're lonely, or dwelling. However, you sound like you're doing very well when he isn't around...Just make sure you two are both honest with each other. Tell him what he needs to do, and what you want to see...and give it enough time to make sure that it's not a facade, that he isn't making those changes temporarily, just to "get you back"...they need to be long lasting changes, not "until i solve the problem" changes.