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post #121 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 02:39 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

Quote:
Originally Posted by Conrad View Post
Sounds like the arb has a few tricks up his sleeve yet.

She has underestimated you.
I owe it to God and also to all of you guys! Without your sustaining support and encouragement, I absolutely wouldn't have had a clue!

Just continue to stand by me as we now approach the litagatory phase!

I love you guys! And I mean all of you!


"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #122 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 05:26 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

Having stayed awake most of the night from analyzing the cell phone records from STBXW's phone line dating from April, 2011 up until she terminated her line effective in late November, the information below is just a sheer statistical analysis of the situation. I sincerely hope that it doesn't begin to bore you:

The analysis looks at the cell phone usage by STBXW basically with three different cell phone numbers: Arbitrator, Austin, and Victor. Arbitrator is the husband of record, Austin is the first OM, who was a friend and co-worker of STBXW's deceased first husband, and Victor, the "newly discovered" OM, who is a physician's assistant, married and the father of five:

April-May, 2011

Arbitrator 36 Calls/85 Minutes = 2.4 minutes per call. 19 placed as incoming calls by Arbitrator; 17 placed by STBXW.(Longest call: 5 minutes)

Austin 24 Calls/484 Minutes =20.2 minutes per call. 10 placed as incoming calls by Austin; 14 placed by STBXW.(Longest call: 83 minutes)

Victor 7 Calls/60 Minutes = 8.6 minutes per call. 5 placed as incoming calls by Victor; 2 calls placed by STBXW.(Longest call: 19 minutes)

Calls with both Austin and Victor seemed to be made either when Arbitrator was either away from home or after he had gone to bed for the evening.

STBXW had 709 text messages for the period along with 23 picture/video messages.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #123 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 06:23 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

May-June, 2011(Moveout ordered by STBXW effective 5/21/2011)

Arbitrator 48 Calls/129 Minutes = 2.7 minutes per call. 38 placed as incoming calls by Arbitrator; 10 placed by STBXW.(Longest call: 12 minutes)

Austin 15 Calls/226 Minutes = 15.1 minutes per call. 8 placed as incoming calls by Austin; 7 placed by STBXW.(Longest call: 34 minutes)

Victor 50 Calls/1,404 Minutes = 28.1 minutes per call. 36 placed as incoming calls by Victor; 14 placed by STBXW.(Longest call: 92 minutes)

This is the month that I'm ordered to say "goodbye" to my dwelling as I'm ordered to move out effective 5/21 with taking youngest son to Houston airport for his out-of-state class trip. We left at 6:30AM as he had to be at the airport no later than 9:00AM.
Moved in, albeit temporarily with college aged son at his student apartment suites until the home owner made our house ready for occupancy.

Interesting items from the cell phone bill is that on 5/20, the day prior to my "banishment," Victor places two calls of 106 minutes duration to STBXW at 7:13PM and ending at 8:59PM. I remember her being in her bedroom with the door closed.

The actual day of my departure shows Austin placing a 16 minute call to her at 1:15PM that afternoon. Talk about the buzzards swooping down on dead meat!

While Austin is still making conversation with STBXW, Victor is coming on very strong in that he has increased his talk time with her to 4 digits. While still living in the home, most call activity by both Austin and Victor made during the daytime while I was usually away. Austin called the afternoon of my banishment.

Victors calls seemed to coincide with his practice. He called STBXW almost every morning prior to 7AM(and she was a self professed non-morning person), at lunch time, and at about the end of the work day. On Sunday, 5/22, he placed calls of some 92 minutes to STBXW.

Victor seems to have clearly established an M.O. of calling STBXW very early in the morning prior to 7AM, probably as a "good morning" wake-up call, usually lasting from 50-70 minutes each.

Another interesting aspect of this bill shows that STBXW's cell phone usage indicates a 5/12 trip on her part to the hometown of Victor in South Texas some 3 hours away. She had told me earlier that she had to go into Houston(which she obviously did) but then made a detour South as indicated by her incoming/outgoing calls. She reached his hometown at around 4PM, and was not in communication with anyone until nearly 10PM, when I called her asking when she would be home.(Established 6 hour window) I was told by her that she had encountered some problems and would be starting for home very soon. She actually did arrive back home at about 12:45AM the next morning.

While enroute home, she received Austin's phone calls of some 32 minutes at about 11PM.

For this billing cycle, STBXW's test message usage was reported at 1,077 texts sent/received with 15 picture and video texts.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html

Last edited by arbitrator; 07-16-2012 at 05:50 AM. Reason: Additional Information/Analysis
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post #124 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 07:08 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

June-July, 2011

Arbitrator 0 Calls/ 0 Minutes = 0.0 minutes per call. (Longest Call: 0 minutes) [ "180" Maybe?]

Austin 8 Calls/135 Minutes = 16.9 minutes per call. 5 placed as incoming calls by Austin; 3 placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 45 minutes)

Victor 92 Calls/1,520 Minutes = 16.6 minutes per call. 86 placed as incoming calls by Victor; 6 placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 59 minutes)

Arbitrator apparently has gone "180" on STBXW, and vice-versa. Meanwhile, back at the farm, Victor is still, far and away, greatly amassing the lion's share of the cell-phone time with STBXW. Still using his same call patterns from before, probably to not arouse any suspicion from the cohorts at his medical practice. Not bad for a married man and father of 5!

STBXW seems to only talk with Austin very sparingly. But her call records indicate that she was in Austin's hometown from 6/24 through 6/26(a weekend) with no calls to/from Austin for that time. But she's apparently taking, as well as placing calls, to Victor during this particular timeframe. Very strange. Apparently, she's back at home by 6PM on Sunday, 6/26, and placing a call to Austin, then abruptly receiving calls from Victor.

For this particular billing cycle, STBXW's text-messaging activity includes 938 sent/received texts, plus 29 picture and video texts.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #125 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 07:38 PM
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

That is just baffling.

I'm sorry you had to find all of this out .. and that it happened to you.
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post #126 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 07:39 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

July-August, 2011

Arbitrator 1 Call/ 2 Minutes = 2.0 minutes per call. 1 placed as incoming call by Arbitrator; 0 placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 2 Minutes)

Austin 9 Calls/ 144 Minutes = 16.0 minutes per call. 4 placed as incoming by Austin; 5 placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 38 Minutes)

Victor 122 Calls/ 2,489 Minutes = 20.4 minutes per call. 101 placed as incoming by Victor; 21 placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 136 Minutes)

Victor continues to win the "Cell-Phone" Sweepstakes going away, employing his same early morning, lunch hour, and late-evening call tactics. Austin gets his calls in to her and just occasionally, seems to merit one from her. As for Arbitrator, he must have really had a weak moment for that one 2 minute call~he can't even remember what it might have even been vaguely about!

STBXW makes an out-of-state trip for a week, where more often than not, Victor is still richly keeping her company, with the very occasional call to/from Austin.

For this particular billing cycle, STBXW amassed some 944 text messages sent/received, along with 60 picture/video texts.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #127 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 07:59 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

August-September, 2011

Arbitrator 0 Calls/ 0 Minutes = 0.0 minutes per call.

Austin 0 Calls/ 0 Minutes = 0.0 minutes per call.

Victor 36 Calls/ 764 Minutes = 21.3 minutes per call. 31 calls placed as incoming calls by Victor; 5 calls placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 85 Minutes)

Victor is direly in danger of violating the Sherman Anti-Trust Act as he now has monopolized the affection of STBXW, apparently being the only "Cell-Phone Beau" in her life. Now this bill was somewhat abbreviated in that STBXW made her European business trip from 8/21 to 9/7/11. On 8/21, she made a "bon voyage call" to Victor shortly before departing. On 9/7, Victor immediately called her upon her return to a Texas airfield.

For this billing cycle, STBXW had 309 text messages sent/received with 5 picture/video texts.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #128 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 08:25 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

September-October, 2011

Arbitrator 4 Calls/ 24 Minutes = 6.0 minutes per call. 0 calls placed as incoming by Arbitrator; 4 calls placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 8 Minutes)

Austin 11 Calls/ 360 Minutes = 32.7 minutes per call. 9 calls placed as incoming by Austin; 2 calls placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 101 Minutes)

Victor 36 Calls/ 651 Minutes = 18.1 minutes per call. 31 calls placed as incoming by Victor; 5 calls placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 60 Minutes)

Victor's quality cell-phone time with STBXW seems to be losing stroke. I sense something strange as the times per call begin to somewhat wane; and then the longest call from him occurs on 9/18 and that is the last call that is logged in by/from him. Now either he gave her a "Dear Judy" speech, or she bestowed him with a "Dear John" speech~ but contact with him abruptly ends on that morning.

Conversely, Austin is making inroads as his cell time is now climbing. So is Arbitrator's; STBXW called to inform that she was coming to town to drop off some boxes that she wanted to get out of her way.

For this billing cycle, STBXW amassed some 380 sent/received text messages with 9 picture/video messages.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #129 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 08:41 PM
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

Quote:
Originally Posted by UpnDown View Post
That is just baffling.

I'm sorry you had to find all of this out .. and that it happened to you.
Actually, I'm glad you found this out.

What you've been baffled about got resolved.

Good job Arb!
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post #130 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 08:43 PM
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

Well yeah, it's good that he discovered it. Helps his case like no other.

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post #131 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 08:52 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

October-November, 2011

Arbitrator 7 Calls/ 20 Minutes = 2.8 minutes per call. 5 calls placed as incoming by Arbitrator; 2 calls placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 7 Minutes)

Austin 20 Calls/ 426 Minutes = 21.3 minutes per call. 5 calls placed as incoming by Austin; 15 calls placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 145 Minutes)

Victor 0 Calls/ 0 Minutes = 0.0 minutes per call.

Now being a non-entity in the STBXW Derby, Victor does not call anymore. Nor does she call him! Austin has now taken over as the sole "beau" in her life, as richly evidenced by STBXW now chasing and calling him. She's calling him now late at night and having rather long conversations.

Now this particular timeframe shows a trip to New Orleans from 11/4 until 11/7. Given the newest evidence of the longer conversations carried on with Austin, during the NOLA trip, there are only two entries of calls to him, each lasting only 1 minute in length each and placed by STBXW; which greatly suggests that he is with her there in the Crescent City, because one doesn't exactly need a cell phone to communicate with and talk for hours on end, more especially when they're physically there with you in the same bed.

For this billing cycle, STBXW amassed 367 sent/received test messages, with 21 picture/video messages.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #132 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 08:56 PM
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

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Originally Posted by arbitrator View Post
October-November, 2011

Arbitrator 7 Calls/ 20 Minutes = 2.8 minutes per call. 5 calls placed as incoming by Arbitrator; 2 calls placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 7 Minutes)

Austin 20 Calls/ 426 Minutes = 21.3 minutes per call. 5 calls placed as incoming by Austin; 15 calls placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 145 Minutes)

Victor 0 Calls/ 0 Minutes = 0.0 minutes per call.

Now being a non-entity in the STBXW Derby, Victor does not call anymore. Nor does she call him! Austin has now taken over as the sole "beau" in her life, as richly evidenced by STBXW now chasing and calling him. She's calling him now late at night and having rather long conversations.

Now this particular timeframe shows a trip to New Orleans from 11/4 until 11/7. Given the newest evidence of the longer conversations carried on with Austin, during the NOLA trip, there are only two entries of calls to him, each lasting only 1 minute in length each and placed by STBXW; which greatly suggests that he is with her there in the Crescent City, because one doesn't exactly need a cell phone to communicate with and talk for hours on end, more especially when they're physically there with you in the same bed.

For this billing cycle, STBXW amassed 367 sent/received test messages, with 21 picture/video messages.
Arb,

As I told OVS...

rafiki: it is time! - YouTube

And, how many of those pic messages were of Austin's package?

She is scum.
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post #133 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 09:15 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

November 8-27, Close of STBXW's Presence on Cell-Phone Account prior to her moving her lines to another carrier.

Arbitrator 0 Calls/ 0 Minutes = 0.0 minutes per call.

Austin 4 Calls/ 83 Minutes = 20.8 minutes per call. 3 calls placed as incoming by Austin; 1 call placed by STBXW. (Longest Call: 46 Minutes)

Victor 0 Calls/ 0 Minutes = 0.0 minutes per call.

STBXW closed cell phone account effective 11/27. Victor remains a non-entity in her life, and it's rather strange that Austin's cell time is now showing signs of diminishing. No apparent holiday calls to anyone of a romantic interest on Thanksgiving, so it makes me wonder where STBXW is going from here.

Now I will be getting the cell-phone records starting with March to April, 2011 and working backward all the way to March to April, 2010. Should be able to uncover more evidence from that to forward to legal counsel.

For this particular billing cycle, STBXW amassed some 341 sent/received text messages.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #134 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 09:58 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

Accumulative Stats for April-November, 2011

Arbitrator 96 Calls/ 260 Minutes = 2.7 minutes per call. 63 incoming calls placed by Arbitrator; 33 calls placed by STBXW.

Austin 91 Calls/ 1,783 Minutes = 19.6 minutes per call. 44 incoming calls placed by Austin; 47 calls placed by STBXW.

Victor 343 Calls/ 6,888 Minutes = 20.1 minutes per call. 290 incoming calls placed by Victor; 53 calls placed by STBXW.


Victor seemed to show far more evidence of being the pursuer in his relationship with STBXW. Judging from the calls and the trip she made to see him, it is apparent that they finally went PA from a very long EA. Having scored with him and contingent on his dogged pursuit of her, I can only opine that she grew tired of him and finally closed things out.

Austin and STBXW consummated their relationship back in 2010, and possibly earlier, all from their FB connection. Having been enamored by the physicians assistant, she distanced herself enough from Austin to see if anything would come to fruition with Victor. It didn't and she went running back to Austin, as evidenced by the ratio of the number of phone calls that she ended up making to him! And she, no doubt, rekindled her physical relationship with him.

To date, I have no earthly idea where she is at in having a romantic relationship with anyone.

And as for poor, old Arbitrator, he is just holding the bag, but feeling rather blessed that he will soon find himself free from this nightmare, and holding what I hope, is the trump card in richly putting this sordid marriage as far behind him as possible!


And for the record, for this accumulative billing cycle, STBXW amassed some 5,065 total sent/received text messages on just her cell phone alone.

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #135 of 633 (permalink) Old 07-13-2012, 10:08 PM
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Re: Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment

Arb,

Seriously... this is your night.

Take a bow.

and....

EXCUSE ME WHILE I STAND AND APPLAUD
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