Mamatomany

"Can we do a thread what I don't miss about my stbx? this ones making me sad ..."


So true...

2nd_t!me iz_best

i dont miss always wondering who the next man will be with my exw

Mamatomany

I am sure my list could get longer but first ...
I don't miss wondering what he's doing on the computer all the time... closing, locking it whenever I walked near the room. Tapping away at the computer... deceptive behavior.

His recent passive aggressive behavior (w/i the last 2 yrs).

that_girl

I have never been divorced, but I had this one bf who thought it was sexy to stand in front of me, naked, and shake his.....talent...all while saying "Nenga nenga nenga".

I don't miss that repulsiveness.

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YinPrincess

I don't miss the random fits of violence - the screaming, crying and intensity of his emotional tantrums. I don't miss the way he'd bash my head into the wall, or punch me in the back, or throw me to the floor. My ex was a good person before he got on drugs.
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jpr

he would never close the bathroom door when he pooped,and it would stink up the whole house.

jpr

that is horrible, yin.

sd212

I don't miss how she never went out of her way for me after the first couple years. How I did so many things to make her life wonderful and she did the bare minimum.

I don't miss how she was never spontaneous. I don't miss how she didn't appreciate all the things I did for her.

I don't miss how she never really listened to the details of my work life.

I don't miss how she never wanted to work but yet wanted to spend money like it was nothing.

I suppose I don't miss how she never really loved me. God, I didn't realize it till I typed it there.

Mamatomany

Hey SD I have a selfish question:
I have seen a lot of men talk about wanting women to be spontaneous, what exactly do you all mean?

I am just wondering what this might mean because I have kids and a time demanding career ... would this be a problem for men who want spontaneity?
Just trying to prepare/better myself.

Wildflower3

Ok, bitter side coming out (knowing full well I have my faults too...)

1. How he could be big man on campus at work, but be totally incompetent at home (only folded socks and underwear and god forbid I ask him to work the washer or dryer! He wouldn't know how to work the knobs and buttons)

2. Asking if he had any of his favorite underwear or undershirts clean. Yeah, in the pile of folded clothes in the corner which I now refuse to put away for you...

3. Not appreciating the fact that I, too, had a full time job and took on ALL the household responsibilities, yet still encouraged him to go out golfing on the weekends because I knew he needed time to blow off steam.

4. Claiming that I made him feel guilty (put him through guilt trips??) by doing laundry and household chores while he sat on the couch drinking his beers watching the football/baseball games on weekends. I was not guilt tripping him, I was just doing the laundry/chores! The guilt was on him!! I just needed to get s*** done! (How could he accuse me of guilt trips when I was just doing what I needed to do!!) I wanted him to be able to relax after his heavy work week!!! I was trying to help HIM!

5. The fact that (don't get me wrong, I got THREE PERFECT KIDS out of this) he NEVER loved me and making me think that our whole relationship was a sham because he was too much of a coward to leave me when he wanted to. ANGRY BITTER SIDE COMING OUT...if that's the case, he cheated me out of a life that I could've had with someone who did love me and who would work on our marriage no matter what, especially with 3 adoring kids.

67flh

i sure don't miss my ex wife mental issues,cheating or lies, oh and of course i sure don't miss when she stabbed me.

Wildflower3

WOW! I think you may have us all beat...

sd212

I am the kind of guy who would come home on a Friday from work and say, "I got reservations at a cabin for the weekend, pack a bag!" She would groan and roll her eyes.

I was so damn happy all the time and just wanted spontaneity in the sense of doing anything fun, anytime the mood struck.

One of my kids was saying they wanted to go to the beach one Saturday morning so I packed the car before she got home from the market and said, "we're going to the beach today" 8 hour trip that she probably didn't love but the kids still talk about the day we went to the beach for 1 day.

Perhaps selfish here, but sexually as well. I would order her hundreds of dollars of Victoria's Secret when she was down and not feeling "sexy" but then when i got home she would still have it in the bag it was delivered in and much of it never untagged.

Those are all just my examples. Can't really say what other men mean when they talk about it. The biggest thing for me would just be spontaneous weekend or overnight trips. Nothing big, just something fun that was unplanned. That is what life is all about to me. Not her. Well, not her w/ me anyway. I suspect her NM and her are enjoying such things just as they are enjoying all the other things she wasn't happy about with me.

proudwidaddy

I don't miss stopping over early one Sunday morning to see my kids and see another mans truck in my driveway. I don't miss being told she will love me forever, than three weeks later telling me she wants a divorce. I definitely didn't enjoy moving out of the house 4 days before Christmas.
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Mamatomany

Wow!! Wow! I have never experienced that.
As long as it wasn't during a stressful work period I would be sooooo excited!
I ALWAYS asked what was planned ... I had to plan everything.