Reconciliation after divorce - is it possible?
My wife and I have been married for 10 years, in a relationship for 13 and known each other for almost 20. We have two beautiful children, age 6 and 3. My wife says she does not love me any more and wants a divorce. I wish I could say it was "out of the blue" (it was) but in retrospect, all the signs were there. We are "good people", never fought, etc. But I had let my job get to me and neglected her emotionally, and she has embarked on a journey of self realization and spirituality and she says she has to do it alone.
Being out of options (I asked for a chance for us, she will not agree) and out of respect to her, I have agreed to divorce. But not because this is what I want. I want a chance to win her back, have an even better relationship and not lose my family.
We live abroad, and it will take about 2 months to return and then I suppose 2 months or so to process the divorce.
Again, the problem is that she says she has fallen out of love with me (somewhere in the last year) and is not interested in having any outside third party try to "fix it".
My question is, given such an adamant stance, and further assuming that the divorce does happen, can I still apply these (and other) techniques to try and get her back? I don't want to say it is all over even after the divorce if it happens, count my losses and get on with life. I want to try and fix it even then. I want to change, I need to change. My plan, if it plays out that way (which seems likely), is to respect her wishes, divorce, stay close to the children and actively participate, make a big change in myself (a true one, not just to appease her), and the, I hope, maybe she will see the new me and come back.
So again my question is (and sorry for asking it in a simplistic way), should I still execute a game plan if we are divorced? Or has so much damage been done that she is beyond a point of no return?
I know that there may always be "a chance" but I guess what I am asking is for your experience and perspective on how to relate to this.