Well you live in CA.... don't know where is CA. One of my brothers live in the LA area. He makes fairly good money and can hardly afford it. So I know what you mean about the $10 an hour thing not being enough there.
Could you divorce him but stay living where you are? At least that would give you some sense of separation.
Does his father know what is going on?
Or could you get some welfare, food stamps, housing etc and be on your own?
I'm in Orange County.
I don't think I could divorce him and still stay here. That would be asking a lot from his dad, who, to answer your next question, has not been told about what's going on. I don't know if my father in law would let me stay if I divorced my husband, but I don't want to put him in the position of having to make that decision.
Getting housing assistance is out of the question. Applications for this year have already closed, and the wait time for help is 2-5 years. If I found a job that paid me enough to afford rent, with just enough to pay for utilities, then I wouldn't qualify for food stamps... so I'd have no food and no way to pay for day care for my son (because the line to get assistance for THAT is also a mile long)
Besides, those programs are spread thin, and there are plenty of women trying to get away from drug addicts and men that are beating them and they need it more than I do. I'm trying to escape from being irritated and sad for the rest of my life... some of those women are fighting FOR their lives and the lives of their children.