05-22-2012, 07:03 PM
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Great Plains
| | Almost Divorced and Met Someone - Quandry
I don't know if anyone that was here when I first started posting is still around, but I needed to take some time off and clear my head. For anyone that does remember me, here is the Cliffs' Notes version of what has happened.
Obviously by my title line you can see that reconciliation was not achieved. I am in the final phase of my divorce and I have to say to anyone going through this...get a counselor or therapist if you can. It makes a world of difference. If you don't feel like they are helping, find a new one. I believe that my counselor has brought me miles where I would have only come feet if I had tried to do it on my own.
My divorce is close, the STBXW is dragging her feet for some reason, but that is nothing more than I expected at this point. For those who don't know the story, she left me...no cheating, no abuse, no drugs or alcohol...just wanted out.
Here is the question. I recently met a work colleague who is divorced as well. Has been for some time. I am not looking for a relationship, but I do like her and want to spend time with her as friends..maybe more in the future, but that is a ways off. Long story short, after only two one-on-one meetings, she asked me to an event with her friends, gave me her number, and as I was leaving invited me to stay and have lunch with her. Being a complete idiot, I begged off lunch with an excuse and didn't go to the event. Now, I want to email her and keep the lines of communication open, but having been out of the social world for many years, I don't know what to say. I am afraid I have already alienated her by my actions.
So, any advice?
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius -- and a lot of courage -- to move in the opposite direction