how to find the courage to file - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 06-07-2012, 02:29 AM Thread Starter
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how to find the courage to file

So it has been over a month that the husband said he wanted a divorce, finally moved his things out last week and I'm still dying inside wanting to be with him.

Told him from the start of this he is going to have to be the one to file for the divorce bc this is his choice and something he has to do. He has seemed to move on to another woman and still hasnt filled.

I have come to the conclusion I will have to file the paper work to try to move on, but I cant bring myself to do it through the hurt.... what advice do you have to help me bite the bullet and file for divorce?
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 06-07-2012, 07:16 AM
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Re: how to find the courage to file

If he has moved on to another woman, picture this:

He comes back in a week and says "let's work this out. I want to be with you".

Do you think you can really go on like that? Can you ever trust him? Will you even forgive him for the mere action of leaving, let alone being with another woman?

This is the person who promised to stay with you and be your protector. Not only he failed to do that, he actually attacked the very core of your vulnerabilities and left you bleeding.

There's your courage.
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 06-07-2012, 07:39 AM
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Re: how to find the courage to file

The act of you filing for Divorce is a reality check. It is a signal to him that you will no longer be waiting in the wings for HIM to make a decision. At anytime during the process you can change your mind, however by beginning the process signals the beginning of the end of his control over YOUR life.

Take control of your life. Show him that you will wait no longer. The courage lies in your ability to take that stand as an individual and send him the message that you will not be waiting to welcome him back.

Best of luck to you.
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 06-08-2012, 12:59 AM Thread Starter
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Re: how to find the courage to file

thanks guys for the words of encouragement and support! you are both correct that i should no longer let him run my life and need to move on, but i still cant help but think am i doing this to send him a "signal" in hope that he will come back or am i truly doing this for myself.

i just dont know if i am ready to make it that final even though he has...
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