They leave because of the fight or flight response.
They don't know what else to do...their pain is great and they can't deal....flight is what they choose.
The more I hear the details regarding "taking care of my mental health" I say it is truly, truly about him. He's messed up big time...like my H.
In retrospect, I didn't take care of my mental health. I stood to fight. I guess in many ways, had I been a different person, like our H's I would have fled. Hmmm.
I don't know if we can let go. We are still emotionally attached knortoh. Letting go means having NO hope or not wanting that relationship. I'm not there. I won't be there after the divorce either.
Maybe he'll get a girlfriend or turn out to be gay or have some secret life that totally gets me angry and detached. Heck...I'm not sure that would even do it.
I think it will just take time. We may end up finding another relationship after the divorce and figure out what we've missed. I'm just allowing myself to take life as it comes.
Yes time. It is eternal and sometimes marches by so slowly in the moment. And then you look up and it is years later. You wonder where the time went. Now it stands still for us. For them, I guess it keeps moving.
Detachment is best. I know it means no hope. But for our sanity, it is best.
__________________
Kindness, Caring, Love and Understanding for Me, for Her and my son. Well not so much for Her anymore.
I think I'm to the point where I want whatever is going to happen to happen. I'm tired of dealing with all of these emotions. I'm tired of waiting for my H to serve me divorce papers.
In some ways I so desperately want the clocks to turn back to June or July when things were better. In other ways I want to move on.
One thing is for sure, I still miss the man I married. I miss him a lot and I don't know what happened to him.
Wren life is grey - and the short answer to your question is 'yes'....
we overlooked this because we loved them - their spirit, their kindness, their presence...
it was a risk - they didn't grow up with us -
it is so sad
Can I just share that I am no longer 'going' mad - I am mad...I have had to work very long hours the last few days - trying to earn enough money to keep floating...and it has meant sitting at the computer...hence why I am able to keep up with everyone's posts!
can't go out to exercise because of kids
so I have taken to getting up every hour or so and running around my back yard - (it's pretty big) but I just jog around and around - -
'But I don’t want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
'Oh, you can’t help that,' said the Cat. 'We’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.'
'How do you know I’m mad?' said Alice.
'You must be,” said the Cat. 'or you wouldn’t have come here.'”
Re: think I am going mad - anyone else had this?
