My New Beginning - Page 3
 Talk About Marriage
  The Marriage Advice and Relationship Help Forums
  right
Forums - For Therapists - Link to Us - Advertise  

    A Public Forum Provided by The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory
Register FAQ Community Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Going Through Divorce or Separation A new addition to our forums, a place to go for sharing and support for those going through divorce and separation.

Like Tree1Likes

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 10-15-2009, 10:11 AM   #31 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 1,647
Default Re: My New Beginning

Another day and here is my mantra "No Matter What Happens, I Will Handle It". And "I Am Perfectly Imperfect".

Positive affirmations to get into my head. To look at the crisis I'm in as a gift from the universe. If it wasn't for my w, I wouldn't be learning so much about me. Why I felt unfullfilled. Why my needs are important. That only I can make myself happy.

I control me and no one else. I can do anything.
__________________
"Don't think less of yourself, think of yourself less" ....C.S. Lewis
Feelingalone is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 10-15-2009, 10:31 AM   #32 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,362
Default Re: My New Beginning

at a low moment my mum told me
you are in control of you
she's hasn't read any self-help books it was pure life experience talking - it has stayed with me
knortoh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2009, 11:00 AM   #33 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,641
Default Re: My New Beginning

It's good to hear you saying positive things FA. I'm no longer hearing that it was your fault or you caused the relationship breakdown. I know, in your heart, all along that you felt she contributed. Not until you knew that she was with OM (for sure) did you start really allowing yourself to think she was a big contributor to the breakdown.

I feel sorry for my H and the ones that will live their lives repeating the same mistakes. How fulfilling is that? I NEVER want to go through something like this. I don't know if I will ever marry again. I know many say that and change their minds. It's just the heartbreak and drama involved is so intense. I've always loved a calm and peaceful life. It's one that I've chosen.
Corpuswife is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2009, 11:22 AM   #34 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 1,647
Default Re: My New Beginning

Yes it feels good. I'm starting to realize that the biggest difference between my w and the other woman I dated was (1) I truly loved her and (2) she is the mother of my child. Number 2 is what made me fall into NG land. I was worried about the family so much that I gave myself to her lock stock and barrel. I didn't want the unit to come apart. But NG didn't help and then this crap by her.

So I am feeling empowered again.
__________________
"Don't think less of yourself, think of yourself less" ....C.S. Lewis
Feelingalone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2009, 05:04 PM   #35 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,362
Default Re: My New Beginning

So FA you think the tipping point for you was your son and the idea of the family unit...?
I know that I have said this before but I feel lots of your underlying issues (as regards you and your wife) are really about very different 'moral' takes on life - for you the family unit was sacred...
it seems to me that what you are saying is that you felt by 'worshipping' her doing the NG stuff you could protect what you vaued most -a family life for your son...
it is heartbreaking when we realise that we have to let go of that stuff isn't it?
knortoh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2009, 05:13 PM   #36 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 1,647
Default Re: My New Beginning

She is nothing to me now. NOthing........................................... .................................................. .................................................. ........
__________________
"Don't think less of yourself, think of yourself less" ....C.S. Lewis
Feelingalone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2009, 06:22 PM   #37 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,641
Default Re: My New Beginning

Nothing....does that mean you are trying to convince yourself that she's nothing? Or do you think that you've completely detached yourself at this point?
Corpuswife is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2009, 07:21 PM   #38 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 1,647
Default Re: My New Beginning

She is gone from my life as of tonight. I am taking my son and leving.
__________________
"Don't think less of yourself, think of yourself less" ....C.S. Lewis
Feelingalone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2009, 07:37 PM   #39 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,362
Default Re: My New Beginning

FA, where are you going?
knortoh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2009, 09:54 PM   #40 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,641
Default Re: My New Beginning

Let us know what you're thinking or doing? You are sounding different now. I've already PM'd you.
Corpuswife is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-16-2009, 04:23 AM   #41 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 1,647
Default Re: My New Beginning

Sorry about that guys. Just a very angry moment last evening. I PM'd you both back and explained. I just don't like two faced people and I was played.

The realization of how much I was played just got to me last night. Went to bed right after that post.

Thank you for your concern.
__________________
"Don't think less of yourself, think of yourself less" ....C.S. Lewis
Feelingalone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-16-2009, 07:59 AM   #42 (permalink)
Member
 
wren's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 450
Default Re: My New Beginning

Thinking of you FA. I hope you're okay.
wren is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-16-2009, 08:36 AM   #43 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 1,647
Default Re: My New Beginning

I'm doing the best I can. My exW is unleashing my beast within. And she won't like it.
__________________
"Don't think less of yourself, think of yourself less" ....C.S. Lewis
Feelingalone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-16-2009, 08:39 AM   #44 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,641
Default Re: My New Beginning

WHEW! That was a sucky day????

I worry that you are holding this in for too long. I think you need to tell her (soon) that you know what she's up to. I would also love to confront this OM as well. Let him know that his wife needs to know the situation.

I can't believe you haven't unleashed yet!
Corpuswife is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-16-2009, 08:45 AM   #45 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 1,647
Default Re: My New Beginning

I don't have everything I need quite yet totallly unleash. As I said in my PM I will be getting a background check done on him to determine where he lives. Also probably a couple more days of pictures. Want to have the ammo to unleash properly.
__________________
"Don't think less of yourself, think of yourself less" ....C.S. Lewis
Feelingalone is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Beginning of the End? stamford Going Through Divorce or Separation 122 02-22-2013 04:32 AM
Beginning or beginning of the end... Attono General Relationship Discussion 6 11-20-2012 04:47 PM
New Beginning??? marksaysay Life After Divorce 4 06-27-2012 03:49 PM
are they in the beginning of EA? am_i_crazy35 Coping with Infidelity 175 08-25-2011 02:33 PM
Is this the beginning of the end? sittenontime Considering Divorce or Separation 2 08-13-2008 02:01 AM

Member Area

Find a Therapist:


Sponsor Ads


Sponsor Ads




Get The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory Help Guide via Email:
Name:
Email:




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:01 PM.



Copyright 2007 - 2013 © Talk About Marriage