12-12-2009, 10:58 PM
Join Date: Nov 2009
| | Trial Separation Blues
Feeling down tonight. Went to pick up the kids and wife is telling me that she's going out with a couple of friends tonight. I would really rather she not tell me ANYTHING. Too many other nights out with "friends" ended up being time alone with a different "friend."
I've been exercising, reading, spending time with my kids, listening to and playing more music, and going to church again in the last 2-3 weeks, but I've still got the blues. Just too much uncertainty. She says she wants to work things out, but I have NO CLUE as to what she's doing or what she REALLY wants.
I have to measure progress on what little I can see. She probably missed 1/3 of our therapy appointments before the separation - I'll know if that improves. She was grouchy with and ignored the kids while texting/playing on facebook. I'll be able to get a feel from them - do they want to go to Mom's apartment, or do they seem to dread it? Do they talk about doing things with Mom, or just kind of quiet when they get back?
So far things seem a little better, but its only been a week and a half since she started sleeping at her own place.
Sad thing - what I think I miss the most is being greeted at the door by our dog!
Wish I could read her mind or read into the future. But I can't. Just gonna have to feel these blues and learn a little patience.