Originally Posted by Relationship Teacher View Post
Even though Facebook can facilitate some cheating, it is not the reason for the cheating. At best, it is an excuse. The problem isn't Social Media. The problem is a relationship that lacks boundaries and respect.
Which came first, though, the chicken or the egg?
My opinion is that people are reactive or proactive when it comes to infidelity. There are those that seek it out, and those that do not, yet may be presented with an opportunity and over time, they can justify it in some way.
The same thing can happen in real life, of course, but there's something about being online that gives people a false sense of security and a sort of confidence they don't have IRL.
Let's say some guy sends a d*** pic to you. In real life, to accomplish the same thing, he'd have to literally take his penis out with you standing there. That's unlikely to happen. It's also a crime in most places. But online, it's such a common thing that can, and is, often shrugged off, or even explained away. It happened to my wife a little while back on FB. Guy said it was an "accident", was meant to go to his girlfriend. He got blocked, and that was that. Had he done that in real life, there would have been actual consequences.
It's not even that online activity facilitates this kind of behaviour, it's that it opens one up to all kinds of NEW behaviours. (such as above). It's changed the way people communicate with one another. Imagine if TAM was "real life". 1000's of people standing around talking about marriage and relationships and sex. It wouldn't work, and it wouldn't happen. We're comfortable talking to people from behind a keyboard. I wouldn't have said 95% of the things I've said on here to people I don't know (or probably even to people I DO know).
But more than that, it allows people to say and do things they just wouldn't do in the outside world, it really does. I truly believe that many people DO end up doing things they wouldn't do in real life, or wouldn't have even considered doing.
Yes, it makes it MUCH easier for those who would engage in infidelity regardless, but I do think it opens up a whole new world to many people who wouldn't. Mainly because it's an escape from reality and allows people, even encourages people, to become somebody else.