If you were to ask one hundred different people to describe the perfect relationship, you would probably get responses about things like honesty, fidelity, and trust. But a healthy relationship is not just a pairing of two people who have the same interests and who never fight. A healthy relationship grows and changes as do the individuals in it. If you want to improve your relationship, take the time to speak with your partner about setting goals for your relationship then take steps together toward those goals. Why is it Important to Have Relationship Goals?
Part of a healthy relationship is growing together. In order to grow as a couple, however, you need to have something to work towards and that means setting goals for your relationship. The type of goals you set depends on the current stage your relationship is in. For example, if you are casually dating, the two of you might set a goal for moving toward exclusivity. If you are already exclusive and have been dating for a while, you might talk about taking your relationship to the next step. Even married couples and domestic partners can develop their relationships by setting goals. Unless the two of you set individual goals for your roles in the relationship as well as joint goals for the partnership as a whole, you won’t move forward and that can lead to relationship troubles. Tips for Setting Goals in a Relationship
Before you start setting goals for your relationship, take a moment to learn about the two types of goals you should be thinking about. The first is individual goals for the relationship – how do you want to grow and improve yourself in a way that will benefit your partner and your relationship? The second is joint goals for the relationship – how will you and your partner grow closer to each other and keep your relationship moving forward in a healthy direction? Because there are different types of goals to consider, you may find it helpful to start brainstorming ideas individually. Make a list of the things you’d like to work on such as being a better listener or making an effort to be home for dinner on weeknights.
When you are ready to set goals together, think about all of the various aspects of your relationship including your home life, family, leisure time, and even your finances. It may help you to brainstorm things that you find valuable about your relationship first and then think of ways you can improve upon those things. Once you have set your goals, all you have to do is determine specific things you can do to work toward those goals and then do them! It may be challenging at first but when you start to feel the difference in your relationship, it will all be worth it.
Maintaining a healthy relationship is by no means easy – things never are when you bring two individuals together. You and your partner don’t have to agree on everything and you don’t even have to like the same things. But you do need to love and respect each other and that means viewing your relationship with a practical eye and working together to grow and strengthen your bond.
~ VS Glen Community Support