Hello,
I'm a male, but thought posting in this forum would give me some perspective into the female thought process on this subject. I have been with my wife for close to 18 years, married for 13. WE have had a typical marriage of ups and downs, but for the most part our sex life has remained very active and enjoyable for both! As has the emotional part. We are very good at communication.
Over the last six months we have been fantasizing about having a MMF threesome. A common thread among couples who have been together as long as we have. This is something that when we talk about during sex mutually turns us both on. I am straight, so the excitement derives from me more or less enjoying the sight of my wife being pleasured by another man.
She works hard with her job and is a wonderful mother, and I have always wanted her to experience all that life has to offer. Now mind you, we have awesome sex, where she'll hit climax anywhere from 2-5 times a session. But to see her have a change of pace, something fresh and new, while enjoyed in my company I thought would be a treat for us.
I decided to see where this would go, and introduced an acquaintance of mine to my wife via email. She had never met him. Never knew him. I told him to email her and flirt with her all in good fun. She works from home, stays at home, and has little male interaction in her life so I thought this would be a good way for her to get charged up. Well I was right. She asked of course if she could email him back and I agreed, and for the next week she informed me of all their conversations, which had turned to sexting. Which charged our sex life even further as role playing turned into her being my naughty little wife. So we were having conversations about bringing him into the bedroom for a one night romp...just conversations. No plans.
In between that time, my wife had to take a three night business trip. Well on the last night, she failed to respond to some of my texts after I knew she was at the bar. Which is totally out of character for her. Immediate red light goes off in my head, and I'm thinking something is up.
Turns out she met four men, one of which gently talked her into going back to his room within a matter of two hours. He knew she was married, shocker. She told me she was completely drunk. She is tiny, only 110lbs, and drank four whiskey's before they even showed up..again totally out of character.
She doesn't remember why she actually did what she did, but that it had something to do with our mind games. She said it was all very surreal. She went back to his room, they made out, he took of all her clothing, kissed and sucked on her bre***s, and performed oral on her as well as some other things. But they didn't actually have intercourse. She said as he moved up towards her on the bed, that she was brought back into reality and pushed him off. He obliged and apologized and she left.
She confessed all this to me the next night. Not only that, but told her parents and my parents as well. She was guilt stricken for a very long time, and contemplated suicide even although just to me, which I associated to the newness of the guilt. Those feelings passed within 24 hours for her. But she felt very guilty, crying, disgusted in herself.
Where this really gets sick, is after she told me I left. I was so upset that I went and stayed at a hotel last night and just sat there replaying the events in my head. I forced her to tell me everything, and she hesitantly confessed to more and more.
The next day I came home and we went upstairs into our bedroom to talk. She was sitting on the bed and telling me how sorry she was for what she did. I couldn't help what happened next. I told her to fall to her knees and shift over towards me. I then told her to perform fellatio on me, and she complied, and I felt anger and power all in one sensation. I love my wife. And these feelings scared me, yet excited me.
Over the next four weeks our sex life has been off the charts. I have forgiven her for her incident, and although I don't believe she stopped him, I really have no other choice but to accept it.
This is so very out of character for my wife. She didn't even know his last name. But as time went on and I began to realize, I don't know how out of character this actually is? She has always had an inner edge that I knew existed, but never was given the chance to blossom? We married young, she was 23. I'm no prude either, so I wasn't preventing said "edge" from appearing in our lives. Fast forward to now, and my current challenges :
1 Two weeks after the incident she went to get her nipples pierced. I was with her of course, and was turned on by the thought so I said yeah, let's do it.
2. We continue to fantasize about this third person, and although I made her discontinue the sexting with that other man, we still talk about MMF scenarios during sex, and it's not always her bringing it up.
3. Most troubling, is she had some wine the other night, and was away on business. We were sending naughty pics back and forth, and she told me that "You know you're all I need, you satisfy me, I don't need anyone else, but if you want to explore this we should discuss it" And when I said I wasn't sure, she got all snippy at me. Told me "Screw you" That I'm messing with her mind. I just let it go that night because I knew she had been drinking.
So...My wife, similar to many females, has this sudden urge to be naughty. She is only 36, and I want her to live out her inner "edge" just in a controlled safe environment not jeopardizing our marriage like she almost did already. She has told me everything, and we remain deeply in love. We are even in MC now and not holding back any feelings, as I believe no matter what it is we're feeling not being honest is doing our family no good.
I'm seeking advice on how to stop her from believing this fantasy may become a reality because it's not the actual act that won't turn me on, but it's the aftermath I don't think she is fully considering like I am. We have two young children, and I can't imagine complicating their lives for a night of euphoria brought on by sex. Yes, the idea turns me on significantly, but her behavior the other night about being upset that I'm not in agreement with taking strides to make this happen has me thinking....
We love each other. There has been no other infidelity in our marriage, and I have forgiven her for the incident, however the fact that this happened only a month ago, and she is already wanting to get back to introducing another person into our bed is alarming, no matter how much the thought turns me on.
I'm a male, but thought posting in this forum would give me some perspective into the female thought process on this subject. I have been with my wife for close to 18 years, married for 13. WE have had a typical marriage of ups and downs, but for the most part our sex life has remained very active and enjoyable for both! As has the emotional part. We are very good at communication.
Over the last six months we have been fantasizing about having a MMF threesome. A common thread among couples who have been together as long as we have. This is something that when we talk about during sex mutually turns us both on. I am straight, so the excitement derives from me more or less enjoying the sight of my wife being pleasured by another man.
She works hard with her job and is a wonderful mother, and I have always wanted her to experience all that life has to offer. Now mind you, we have awesome sex, where she'll hit climax anywhere from 2-5 times a session. But to see her have a change of pace, something fresh and new, while enjoyed in my company I thought would be a treat for us.
I decided to see where this would go, and introduced an acquaintance of mine to my wife via email. She had never met him. Never knew him. I told him to email her and flirt with her all in good fun. She works from home, stays at home, and has little male interaction in her life so I thought this would be a good way for her to get charged up. Well I was right. She asked of course if she could email him back and I agreed, and for the next week she informed me of all their conversations, which had turned to sexting. Which charged our sex life even further as role playing turned into her being my naughty little wife. So we were having conversations about bringing him into the bedroom for a one night romp...just conversations. No plans.
In between that time, my wife had to take a three night business trip. Well on the last night, she failed to respond to some of my texts after I knew she was at the bar. Which is totally out of character for her. Immediate red light goes off in my head, and I'm thinking something is up.
Turns out she met four men, one of which gently talked her into going back to his room within a matter of two hours. He knew she was married, shocker. She told me she was completely drunk. She is tiny, only 110lbs, and drank four whiskey's before they even showed up..again totally out of character.
She doesn't remember why she actually did what she did, but that it had something to do with our mind games. She said it was all very surreal. She went back to his room, they made out, he took of all her clothing, kissed and sucked on her bre***s, and performed oral on her as well as some other things. But they didn't actually have intercourse. She said as he moved up towards her on the bed, that she was brought back into reality and pushed him off. He obliged and apologized and she left.
She confessed all this to me the next night. Not only that, but told her parents and my parents as well. She was guilt stricken for a very long time, and contemplated suicide even although just to me, which I associated to the newness of the guilt. Those feelings passed within 24 hours for her. But she felt very guilty, crying, disgusted in herself.
Where this really gets sick, is after she told me I left. I was so upset that I went and stayed at a hotel last night and just sat there replaying the events in my head. I forced her to tell me everything, and she hesitantly confessed to more and more.
The next day I came home and we went upstairs into our bedroom to talk. She was sitting on the bed and telling me how sorry she was for what she did. I couldn't help what happened next. I told her to fall to her knees and shift over towards me. I then told her to perform fellatio on me, and she complied, and I felt anger and power all in one sensation. I love my wife. And these feelings scared me, yet excited me.
Over the next four weeks our sex life has been off the charts. I have forgiven her for her incident, and although I don't believe she stopped him, I really have no other choice but to accept it.
This is so very out of character for my wife. She didn't even know his last name. But as time went on and I began to realize, I don't know how out of character this actually is? She has always had an inner edge that I knew existed, but never was given the chance to blossom? We married young, she was 23. I'm no prude either, so I wasn't preventing said "edge" from appearing in our lives. Fast forward to now, and my current challenges :
1 Two weeks after the incident she went to get her nipples pierced. I was with her of course, and was turned on by the thought so I said yeah, let's do it.
2. We continue to fantasize about this third person, and although I made her discontinue the sexting with that other man, we still talk about MMF scenarios during sex, and it's not always her bringing it up.
3. Most troubling, is she had some wine the other night, and was away on business. We were sending naughty pics back and forth, and she told me that "You know you're all I need, you satisfy me, I don't need anyone else, but if you want to explore this we should discuss it" And when I said I wasn't sure, she got all snippy at me. Told me "Screw you" That I'm messing with her mind. I just let it go that night because I knew she had been drinking.
So...My wife, similar to many females, has this sudden urge to be naughty. She is only 36, and I want her to live out her inner "edge" just in a controlled safe environment not jeopardizing our marriage like she almost did already. She has told me everything, and we remain deeply in love. We are even in MC now and not holding back any feelings, as I believe no matter what it is we're feeling not being honest is doing our family no good.
I'm seeking advice on how to stop her from believing this fantasy may become a reality because it's not the actual act that won't turn me on, but it's the aftermath I don't think she is fully considering like I am. We have two young children, and I can't imagine complicating their lives for a night of euphoria brought on by sex. Yes, the idea turns me on significantly, but her behavior the other night about being upset that I'm not in agreement with taking strides to make this happen has me thinking....
We love each other. There has been no other infidelity in our marriage, and I have forgiven her for the incident, however the fact that this happened only a month ago, and she is already wanting to get back to introducing another person into our bed is alarming, no matter how much the thought turns me on.