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post #16 of 17 (permalink) Old 11-20-2010, 06:21 PM
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Canada
Posts: 853
Re: Please do not be afraid to say it...

Originally Posted by HeartofaPhoenix View Post
Thank you. We have no kids. I have 5 animals that are like family to me though.

I have tried to be strong when leaving, but my family doesn't stand firmly at my side. They just are off doing their own thing or just give me this blank look when he shows up to get me. I've even told my sister. I don't feel as strong as I was and just need someone to help me stand in those moments. I know it's not an excuse, but I don't know where to begin.

I have no car, no license, no job (he let me be a housewife), he maxed out my credit card and scared my closest friend away with his having to tag along and voice his opinion about them when they would come.

I am scared of the next big blow up being a bad one. Like if he freaks out in the car is he going to speed and swerve oncoming traffic again to scare me. He threatens me with suicide. Which I cannot stand.

I just wish I knew where to start.
Start with therapy, so that you can move on from this and learn to love yourself.

You are allowing yourself to be abused, because you don't think that you deserve any better. I say this because I have been there.

Your situation is exactly why I don't understand wives who don't work. When you are completely dependent on a man for money, you lose your power! My husband makes a lot more than me, but if we divorced, I could certainly go back to living alone, as I did before we married.

You're still young, baby. Don't let this ass steal your best years!
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post #17 of 17 (permalink) Old 11-21-2010, 11:58 AM
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 162
Re: Please do not be afraid to say it...

Stop what you're doing, turn off the computer, pack your stuff, and leave right now. RIGHT NOW.

If your parents, other family members, or friends can't or won't let you stay with them until you're on your feet, go to a shelter. RIGHT NOW. NOW!

Do not EVER speak to or see this man again. EVER. It will be the most difficult thing you will ever do - believe me, I know - and you will be tempted many, many, MANY times to go back. DON'T GIVE IN TO THAT TEMPTATION.

Once you have gotten through this, you will be able to handle anything - but you must go through hell to get to heaven. Start right now. GO!
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